Never Giving Up
by Da'khari
Summary: In their ideal world Sam & Mercy have found each other, got married and built a life together, everything was easy until real life got in the way, they struggle to fit the real into their ideal
1. Chapter 1

**Never Giving Up**

 **'Get You' by Daniel Caesar & Kali Uchis **

Sam and Mercy Evans finally decided to get married after just over five years courting, they'd met at some hotel club, while Mercy was on a mini break in Oklahoma, waiting to start university, she was bored and just needed to get away from Los Angeles for a few days, Sam was on a blast out before he started his studies he wanted to be an Archaeologist, they hit it off from the get go and did the long distance relationship thing for a while, they both had life plans they needed to get on the way. So some three years later they finally decided to live together in Los Angeles, it just seemed like the best thing to do, Sam was getting in some experience itching to start his Archaeological career, so he had no real base, while Mercy was working at the main government building in the area as a Foreign Service Worker. They were both planned on travelling a lot with their chosen careers, but had insisted on a base so they could start making plans.

So a week after Sam moved up to Los Angeles from Texas on his 25th birthday, they were deep in house hunting and nest building, ready for when should that ever happen. They eventually found a beautiful three bed apartment in Long Beach a very spacious town home with a large open plan living room with a very spacious kitchen overlooking the garden, two double bedrooms and a more than average office sized room with views across the park. It was in a central location close to shops and free way, with a school not far away should the need come up in the future, they loved their new life and it wasn't long before they were able to move their belongings in and make it totally their own.

Nearly 6 months after that, Sam got a sort of thumbs up from his boss, saying he'd done his qualifying hours and he'd be happy to take him on if he saw a future there with them at Arch's, of course Sam jumped at it, it was his dream job after all, and Mercy encouraged him to take at least a stab at it. He eventually went back to Stan; his boss, and accepted the post, he was given a month settling in period, and warned that life was going to get busy for him very soon after. Sam saw his opportunity and jumped right in, they weren't bad at it so they liked to sing to each other, and did so regularly in random places so he smiled as he thought of his proposal idea and 24 hours later he'd put it into action. He'd acquired a band and showed up for a surprise performance at their lunch time meet up singing his version of " _ **'Marry Me' by Train**_ " putting her name in the lyrics _**'Marry Me Mercy, today and every day'**_ making her laugh hard enough not to have the breath to answer him straight away, of course she said yes eventually

Mercy had taken steps in her career too, she'd got a job at the Local Government Building and there was definitely room for promotion. She'd started the long climb and to be honest she was enjoying it more than she'd ever thought she would, the opportunity for travelling hadn't reached outside the realms of America yet, but she was watching others who had started just like her doing just that, and right now that was encouragement enough for a 25 year old. She'd been past happy at Sam's proposal, she'd always hoped that this was where their relationship was leading, but had opted for the no pressure, ride with it approach it seemed he'd always wanted to take, and if it wasn't broken and all that.

"Seeing as you've got a month reprieve and I'm not anywhere near working abroad just now" she held her ring finger up saying to him the next evening watching him from the couch as he made the hot drinks "Could we maybe get a wedding on the agenda?"

"What that quick?" his eyes quickly moved from the hot drink over to her face "Are you joking?"

"No" she giggled "I'm sort of guessing once this thing starts for you it's going to be hard to work around it, and I just figured we could just get it done before anything else comes up"

"Why have you heard something from work?"

"No" she smiled "Actually I just can't wait to be Mrs Sam Evans"

"And I can't wait either I think your right we should just get it done"

"When?"

"Two weeks time, there's only the parents and Mel for me" he walked over to her tray in hand saying

"And the parents and Dean for me" she smiled back "We can organise a wedding for like eight people don't you think?"

"Sure" he smiled kissing her to seal the agreement before sitting down

"So I guess I could ask Mel to be my chief Bridesmaid?" she asked cheekily "If she approves of me taking her best friend away from her some more"

"I wouldn't even ask her the can I question, she'd presume I even care what she thought about our marriage, and it's none of her damn business" he smiled "But you can ask her if you want, I'm obviously going to ask Dean to be my best man"

"Are we bad for not getting any of our other school friends involved?"

"Come on, all that shit flew for me years ago, I wouldn't even know how to make contact with any of mine" he laughed

"I feel bad to say it, but me either" she giggled "Mine don't bring good memories" she frowned as she watched him pick the cups up and offer her one

"The only friend I need at our wedding is you" he kissed her nose telling her

"You're it for me too babe" she smiled **'Ooohhh who would have thought I'd get you** _ **'**_ she sang at him

 _ **'Oooohh who would have thought I'd get you'**_ he sang back at her "That's our tune"

"Everything's our tune" she laughed

So invites went out via social media, wedding attire was brought on a shoestring, with a new mortgage to support they needed to live within their means, so the wedding party came to them, the wedding took place with the song from their favourite album being played as they danced around the flat, telling each other they were in love, before they left for a weekend away in Paris, on the bank of their parents.

 **4 months Later**

They'd had a few months of comfort, Sam's fieldwork hadn't taken him outside of home for more than two weeks, Mercy's climb was accelerated but still manageable and life was sweet, married life was amazing, they couldn't keep away from each other. Things felt fresh, new, the love was somehow deeper than it had been when they were just together and there was a new found respect that came with the title husband and wife.

"I have a new team" Sam walked in one evening to announce excitedly "I haven't met everyone yet, I just know there's four of us" he smiled as he went towards his wife to say hello properly "Wade, you remember him from my first team when I was training?"

"Hi babe" she smiled up at him

"Hi babe sorry, I'm just excited this is moving on for me"

"I understand excited" she grinned as he sat beside her ready to tell more

"Someone called Shawn Davis I think and Carla somebody, I've never met those two, but it's exciting I hope we get a big one soon"

"That's great babe" Mercy replied giving him a kiss "I have news too" she grinned "I have my first foreign assignment in two weeks, I'm off for three weeks with Donovan, Jean and Mark to China" she said pleased with herself

"You deserve it, you've worked hard for that" he kissed her saying

"So have you" she pulled back to stare into his eyes saying "So here we go grabbing our dreams, I miss you already" she held his eyes telling him

"But think about when we finally get back together" he rolled his eyes telling her, too hurt to tell her he missed her too

"Dinner's ready" she jumped up saying grabbing his hand as they went off towards the bedroom

"But that's the bedroom" he laughed following her anyway

" _ **Every time I look into your eyes I see it, you're all I need"**_ she sang

" _ **Every time I get a bit inside I feel it"**_ he laughed singing back "You are channelled" he rolled his eyes telling her

A few hours later they were giggling laying in each others arms humming _**'And when we're making love, your cries they can be heard from far and wide, it's only the two of us, everything I needs between those thighs, every time I look into your eyes I see it, you're all I need, every time I get a bit inside I feel it'**_ "Now can I get food?" he chuckled

"Sure" she jumped up telling him "Come on" she called as she got to the door, an hour later they were sat in the kitchen, still naked, eating

 **The First Assignment**

"Bye babe" Sam smiled as he waited at the airport for Mercy to get away for her flight **"** _ **Who would have thought I'd get you"**_ he sang to her

" _ **Who would have thought I'd get you"**_ she sang back, hugging him "You love me"

"Remember that right?" he looked into her eyes telling but asking her "You love me"

"I will, you remember that" she poked him telling him

"I will" he laughed kissing her lips lightly before letting her go

That first four months had gone faster than any of them had thought it would, it seemed like they'd just mentioned it and suddenly they were off travelling, working, missing each other. It had been an emotional departure, they knew it would be, but it was what they'd wanted for each other, and what they both needed, they'd promised life wouldn't change for them, the love would make them survive this life they'd chosen.

"Babe" Sam shouted down the crackling connection less than a week after she'd left LA "I've got a dig in the Brazilian Amazon, remember we spoke about it?"

"I can't hear you babe" she shouted back "Your breaking up"

"Brazil next week" he shouted back

"You're in Brazil?"

"Not yet" he looked at the phone frustrated "Next week"

"How long"

"Three weeks" the silence that followed told him everything "I know babe" he told a still silent Mercy "We'll always have Paris"

"We will" she finally said her voice revealing that tears were present "I miss you"

"I miss you too babe" he found himself choking up as he spoke "Listen Shawn turned out to be Shawna"

"What, you're breaking up again, I can't hear what you're saying, I'll call you back next week Sam love you"

"Love you too babe"

"What?" she got out before the phone went dead and the two of them stood looking at their phones

 **Mercy's Two Week Trip**

The Trip was relaxed for Mercy, she'd known the crew since she'd started working at The Building, as they fondly called it, she was great friends with Jean, they lunched together when Sam was busy, so when they were teamed together, she was happy. Jean had been a kind of lone soldier before Mercy came along, it seemed like the other females didn't get on with her but she couldn't see why, she was an absolute laugh.

Within the first week of the assignment Mercy was more than aware of why everyone frowned at her, Jean was having an affair with Mark. Mark was a married man with two children, and that wasn't anything he'd ever hidden, he'd told Mercy within the first fifteen minutes of their first conversation, she couldn't believe this shit was happening. Of course it left Donovan and her in a very awkward position, they were left to keep each other company, she didn't really have a problem with that except Don was a single man, blond dreadlocks, green eyes and every sentence he spoke finished with him licking his lips and a definite fuck me in his eyes, of course she ignored it, but she saw it.

She'd initially been talking to Sam nearly every day keeping herself grounded and shit for the first week, but then he'd called saying he was going on some dig and calls got scarce. She assumed he busied himself getting prepared and then the following day he'd called to say he was leaving for his dig, that Saturday. She wasn't happy that the two weeks she'd thought they were going to spend apart had suddenly turned into five weeks, he'd called just before he went into unchartered territory and lost all contact just to say the usual love you stuff and remind her that Shawn was Shawna, she had alarm bells for a second but she trusted him. They'd both agreed if the temptation had ever gotten too much they'd divorce before they cheated on each other and she knew that was more than lightly going to be her asking.

By the end of her two week assignment, she knew what Donovan's intentions were, she just prayed that they weren't on the next assignment together, and she got time with her husband before the next one too, because abstinence was hard when you knew what you were missing.

 **Sam's Three Week Trip**

Sam and Wade were almost best buddies, they'd worked together since they'd been doing their qualifying hours, they sort of got how each other worked. Wade was a bit of a ladies man being single and good looking, if it needed explaining Sam might have likened him to Jake Gyllenhaal with deeper blue eyes. He had this thing about getting Sam to be the man too, but he'd met Mercy once so he only ever went so far with it.

Sam had been a bit apprehensive when he found out that the other two were females, first off, although he maybe had ten years on him, Wade was always on heat which would surely make everything embarrassing and secondly he wasn't bad looking himself and if any of them got attached he'd cause bad blood because he wasn't getting into the slightest bit of shit with any of them.

That had all been well and good when he hadn't met them but when he did he knew for sure Shawna had attached herself she was blatant with it, before she even knew his name, he rolled his eyes and tried to call Mercy again, they hadn't had contact for two days because she was in some unreachable spot. It didn't help that he was now on his way to some remote place near the Brazilian Amazon, for sure there'd be no satellite out there, they'd be cut off from each other for nearly three weeks, he didn't get hold of her and jammed his phone in his pocket with the frustration.

The first week was as Sam had guested, Wade was all over it asking for groupie action embarrassing everyone with Carla, and Shawna's looks were getting more intense but to add to it all, because of the way Wade was being even 45 year old Carla, who was more Wade's age range, found him the centre of attention so he spent the days working and the nights fending off the unwanted attention from both women

By the end of the three week dig, he knew what Shawna and Carla's intentions were, he just prayed that they weren't on the next dig together, and he got time with his wife before the next one too, because abstinence was hard when you knew what you were missing.

 **2 Months Later**

It had been a hard slog, they'd managed Christmas, Mercy's birthday and their first time together anniversary, their schedules had been past hectic, but their commitment, as they'd promised, was one hundred percent. So month seven was like the treat they'd always needed, wanted, even dreamed of career wise, Mercy was finally getting her chance to talk to the Gambian government for a month and Sam was going on his dream dig somewhere near Easter Island for a month. They had that to look forward but on top of that they were spending Sam's birthday together in the best way, they'd planned to do so much squeezed into the week long break they'd snagged themselves, bed being the first middle and last items on the agenda.

"Happy Birthday Babe" Mercy head popped up saying watching him spurt all over the sheets

"God thanks, I'm so coming for you" he grabbed her head laughing as he pulled her hips up to meet his mouth, smiling when he was satisfied with her sound "Now that was a Birthday treat" he laughed

"Babe" she laughed "Ready for our day?"

"I'm past ready" he smiled looking down at himself

"I mean it babe, no babies just yet, and please don't tell me anything about clocks" she laughed

"Are you saying no on my fucking birthday?"he sat up asking

"I'm saying no protection, we need to stock up, or you can make do with the alternative"

"I swear we work to supply those fucking things" he snapped slamming back on the bed so hard Mercy turned to look at him

"What's that about?" she asked surprised

"We're not moving forward Mercy I want a family, you want a family, but work is stopping us, what the fuck is that about, is it ever going to happen?"

"I guess when we're ready yes" she turned fully to have the conversation

"I'm ready are you hearing me?" he shouted

"Sam" she whined, ready to start her it's my way speech

"Don't Sam me Mercy, I'm not backing down on this I want to start our family" he stared at her saying "You knew this before we got married, before we brought this damn house" he looked around telling her

"This is your fucking birthday" she shouted a cry coming out at the end of the shout

"The tears are not cracking this for me Mercy you always win, I want to start our family now, it's my birthday and that's what I want"

"Talk to me Sam this isn't you, what's up?"

"I just told you" he looked at her saying, they sat staring at each other for the longest time "I'm not changing my mind Mercy seriously" he said before he finally looked away, he couldn't look any longer she was about to ugly cry and that would have got him to give in "Take the day, think about it"

"I have things planned for your bir..."

"I told you what I want for my birthday" he shouted at her, she knew there was no swaying him she just rolled her eyes at the impossible situation

"And will you take my final answer?"

"Only if it's what I want to hear"

"So you're telling me I actually have no choice in this?" he didn't answer her, his look told her she was correct in her assumption "That's so unfair" she cut her eye at him saying

"What's unfair is that you have the power to give me what I want, and yet you refuse me" he cut his eye back at her saying

She didn't answer him that day, his entire birthday plans went to shot as he refused to do anything because he wasn't happy right now and that led into the rest of the week because Mercy went into a sulk for him refusing to do what she'd planned and looked forward to for nearly eight months. By the end of the week they barely said bye to each other and left for their month long expeditions

 **Sam's Big Dig**

"Sam"Shawna shouted him across the airport when he arrived on the Island, he looked around for other faces, any faces but found none

"Shawna" he smiled inside he was rolling his eyes, he hadn't had any of this drama since that first dig, luckily he'd been out with guys "I didn't know you were on this one?" he said as she ran up to him so fast he had to use his hands to stop her from bumping into him, awkwardly resting them on her hips

"They said I was going to see an old friend, I didn't think you either" she laughed "But I'm really pleased to see you" she lifted off him saying "You still married?"

"Yep" he smiled, grateful she'd remembered that

"I'm alright with being your dirty little secret" she grinned up at him

"I don't have secrets from my wife" he told her seriously, hoping she'd catch the seriousness in his voice, but her reaction didn't tell him that was the case, he knew for sure she wasn't listening when she came back at him with

"Just dirty then" making him roll his eyes

"Who else is here?" he asked looking around trying to ignore her remarks

"For now it's just us but I guess Andy should be coming in a week or so"

"A week?" alarm bells going off for him right there

"Yeah his wife's just dropped about a month ago or something" she smiled up at him

That night there was nothing to do except talk, he'd got no reception and furthermore Mercy and he weren't really into that talking thing at he moment, there wasn't an option he was stuck with Shawna for now

"So" she sat next to him with her cup of soup "Who is this woman that's taken you off the market?"

"Mercy my wife" he laughed

"Yeah who is Mercy?" she stopped eating to ask thinking as she spoke "I imagine she's fitter than me like tall, blond, mesmerising eyes, really tight fanny, full of make up and well just fucking perfect in every way, like Mary fucking Poppins" she smiled back at him finishing

"Well" Sam laughed "She's got black hair and she's short but the rest is kind of accurate" he waved his hand saying "Oh and the make up thing, not even necessary, she looks better without actually"

"Sounds perfect" she smiled as Sam looked at her laughing, thinking I like that, she could be a friend

"She is perfect" he looked out at the sea saying "We want a family but the timings all wrong" he looked at his hands saying, his mind telling him not to talk to this person about his personal life and his heart having to let it all out "She works for the Government, she's just gotten her big break, she's always wanted to do it and I guess this is my dream" he looked up in the air saying "I guess I found out I have a biological clock" he laughed

"I know that feeling, that's what broke Simon and I up back then" she looked up saying

"Simon as in..."

"Yeah Simon, we started this thing together back then, he wanted a family I didn't so we parted company, he has his family now and well I'm lonely" she said resting her head on Sam's shoulder

"Do you regret it, not having that family I mean?"

"Sometimes and then, there's a big dig and I forget it all, but I loved Simon and I guess I regret not being the one you know"

"I love Mercy, she's my heart and I don't really know what I'd do if she said no but I want children I need a family" he smiled "I've told you much too much I'm off to bed" he got up saying

The week passed and Andy didn't turn up, their personal conversations were becoming the focus as they seemed to talk morning, noon and night about life, ambitions, digs, everything, he was comfortable

"I think we could be good friends" Sam laughed one night as they sat talking about music

"I want to be more than just your friend Sam" she said moving into him and taking a kiss, he pulled her in, it had been so long since he'd been kissed he took it fully before from nowhere but everywhere Mercy flashed in his mind and he pushed her away

"Shawna why did you do that?"

"We both did that Sam" she pulled him back to her saying

"No I don't want this" he got up and walked away from her saying, that last week was strained as she kept trying and he kept pushing her back, two days before they were due to leave the Island he finally gave in to his feeling "There's something there, I'll admit that, but I'm not a cheat, I can't do this to my wife"

"I know you feel this thing between us Sam, and I know you'll do the right thing, tell her and come to me" she said grabbing his head and pulling it towards her, he was so hungry he fell into her mouth

"I can't cheat on my wife" he finally pulled away saying "I've already gone too far" The next day they left the Island, Shawna with Sam heavy on her lips and Sam with Shawna heavy on his mind

 **Mercy's Trip**

Mercy got to Gambia and found herself in the Presidents quarters, at first she was pissed thinking she'd been sent there on some sell your body to the big man thing but then Jean appeared saying she'd been put in different quarters for some reason apparently and they finally surmised there must be some cast thing going on.

"I guess we're down here with the peasants?" Don asked her as she spun round unaware he'd even entered the large dining room

"I guess" she smiled "But there's no funny business I will not be cleaning floors" she laughed

"Oh me neither have you seen these nails?" he walked towards her flashing his nails at her "Plus my fore-parents did enough of that shit" he laughed

"Fair enough" she laughed "But really why do you think they've separated us?"

"In this man's house there are many room" he said sounding like a king with the echo of his bellow and his African accent "Maybe it's just where they were empty"

"Could be" she half smiled

"What is wrong with you, I've been trying to make you laugh, I mean really laugh all the way here and nothing, are things alright at home?"

"Things are fine at home" she smiled trying to make it convincing "I'm going to my room" she told him walking off

It turned out the President had an eye for Jean and with Mark spending time with his family she was more than willing to butter that particular bread, he was actually a bit of a dish, but Jean's pre-occupation had however left Mercy at a bit of a loose end, that loose end being Don

"Don" she rolled her eyes saying one night in week two when she'd just about had her fill of his stupid fucking get in her knickers jokes, for which she really wasn't in the mood "Will you please stop with the fucking come on, what the hell is wrong with you, do you not get no?"

"I don't want to hear it Mercy" he almost shouted at her, she jumped back in her chair shocked "I'm putting myself on the damn line every time we hook up and do you think it's easy for me to keep bouncing back?" he sat waiting for an answer but Mercy was stunned she couldn't find a response "I love you, do I need to say it any clearer than that?"

"Don I'm..." she muttered unable to think fast enough to respond appropriately

"I know you're married Mercy that's what makes this so fucking sad"

"I'm sorry, well I'm not, I mean I love my husband"

"I know all of that, and I'm willing to wait, I mean you spend more time with me than you do him, he's going to stray I've seen it before, and your not telling me your face has been like that because you guys are happy"

"I shouldn't even be talking to you about my life but we're just in a disagreement at the moment that's all"

"Disagreement you guys aren't together long enough to have disagreements, that's what I'm saying, we have disagreements"

"We don't Don you just piss me off" she chuckled

"And you get on my last nerve, you couldn't do that if I didn't feel something"

"I need to …." she got up saying as Don grabbed hold of her and kissed her hard, she didn't kiss him back but she did allow him to stay there for a while wondering what she was feeling "I need to go to my room, alone" she finally pushed herself off him saying, raising her eyebrows as she walked, she'd actually felt something

"One ring and I'll be there" he shouted after her

"I'm not a cheat" she turned and shouted back

Over the weeks the tension between them grew as Mercy went from reminding herself daily to hourly that Sam existed and it would break their hearts if she cheated.

"I know you feel the same as I do, you know what you need to do" he grabbed hold of her taking her lips one last time before they boarded the plane, they left the Gambia Don with Mercy heavy on his lips and Mercy with Don heavy on her mind

 **Home**

"Hi" Sam said when he saw Mercy come through the door, getting up to greet her, they hugged but there was something missing "Look" he pulled away saying "I just need to say, this baby thing we're arguing about, forget it we can wait" he smiled "And I'm sorry for taking you there"

"I'm sorry for taking it further than it ever needed to go too" she said resting her head on his shoulder as they walked "I missed you"

"I missed you too" he awkwardly grabbed her lips saying

"Sorry Sam it's a bad time of the month for me, I've got another maybe three days left, sorry" she rolled her eyes at the weak hello she was sure he'd have noticed if she hadn't had a good reason

"It's fine, I've waited this long a few days won't hurt" he walked away from her saying, no longer wondering why she'd given such a cold welcome, before thinking _my hello was lame too_

They sat on the couch wrapped in each other feeling like strangers, nothing much to talk about after a month of no contact, not that nothing had happened, just that they couldn't tell a story without leaving Don or Shawna out of it and that would bring awkward questions.

"Good Dig?" Mercy finally asked

"A few pieces but there's a bigger picture there, so maybe next time" he smiled "You?"

"President was more interested in Jean than negotiations" she laughed "I'm going to grab a bath and get some sleep I missed our bed" she got up and turned to smile at him as she left the room

"Mercy" he called getting her attention "You still love me right?"

" _ **Who would have thought I'd get you**_ Mr Evans" she smiled singing

" _ **Who would have thought I'd get you"**_ he sang back

"Why do you ask?"

"I just haven't heard you say that in a while"

"Never doubt it" she rounded back to give him a kiss to seal that deal before leaving him watching the TV

" _What the hell am I thinking, why was I even contemplating that shit, look what I've got at home"_ he looked at his bedroom door thinking _"That woman needs to step off and I'll tell her as much the next time we damn well see each other, I must be fucking crazy"_ he looked at the picture of their wedding day at the side of the TV "Crazy" he smiled _"I actually love my wife always have"_ he shook his head thinking giggling at how stupid he nearly was _"Wade and Andy would tell me how fucking stupid I was being about this even letting it invade my time with Mercy right now, that's why you're sitting out here instead of laying in bed with your damn wife isn't it?"_ "No" he got up telling himself as he jumped in the shower before jumping into bed to hug his wife

" _What the fuck"_ Mercy had run into the bathroom thinking "I _was kissing my husband and it felt alien to me how, why, when, what the fuck happened when you walked into your damn house girl, you need to set yourself straight, you have a man a fine fucking man and Don can fuck off, I'm being serious Mercy Evans forget it"_ "What happened?" _"You thought he didn't love you any more that's what happened"_ she shook her head telling herself as she stepped into the hot water washing everything horrible away "He still loves me" she smiled, some time later her eyes were closing as she lay soaking and she soon opted to find her bed, sorting herself out she finally got into bed, smiling when she heard the door open, they were going to get their cuddles on

"I missed you" she smiled half asleep already, and fully at home finally

"I missed you too" he hugged her in smiling as he finally found sound sleep, his wife in his arms

They'd got back to some sort of normality by day four when Mercy finally came into the main room naked "Sam" she purred

"Hhmmm" he replied without looking up from his journal

"Could you come fix this for me please?"

"In a minute babe" he replied still not looking up

"Fine, but I thought you'd want to fix it as soon as you knew it was broken" the smile in her voice making him look up

"Fixed" he smiled jumping up leaving his journal to fall on the floor "Longest three days ever" he grabbed her lips saying, that day they both knew exactly who it was they wanted "I missed you babe"

"God I missed you too babe" they fell asleep some three hours later humming their song _'_ _ **And when we're making love, your cries they can be heard from far and wide, it's only the two of us, everything I needs between those thighs, every time I look into your eyes I see it, you're all I need, every time I get a bit inside I feel it'**_ waking up for food and more of the same

 **Sam's Call**

Sam was sitting in the garden writing in his journal again some ten days later when his phone rang "Shit" he hissed when he looked at the face to see Shawna's name on it, reluctantly he answered it "Shawna, what's up?"

"What's up?" she laughed "I expected your call a while back, have you forgotten me?"

"In that way I have I'm sorry, I love my wife, I'm in love with her actually, I guess I was just missing home to let that between us happen"

"You know that's not real for you Sam, you told me as much, you even admitted you weren't happy" she moaned

"I never said I wasn't happy" he raised his voice telling her "Look I love my wife, you were a mistake and that's all I've got to say, please don't call me again" he said putting the phone down to hear it ring again, rolling his eyes as he watched her name flashing on his screen again "What do you want Shawna?" he asked angrily

"I'm not giving up on us Sam, I'm going to fight for you" she said and put the phone down, he sat looking at the phone wondering exactly what that woman meant by that, getting shaken out of his thought when Mercy landed on his lap

"Hi babe, you ready for me?" she asked kissing his lips before he could answer

 **The Next Day**

"Babe" Mercy shouted through the house "Babe" she shouted again as Sam went running from the kitchen back to the bedroom

"What's up?" he charged into the room asking

"I just thought you needed to know" she smiled

"Mercy" he grinned "You scared me shitless" he jumped on the bed telling her "There are more romantic ways to ask for love"

"I know but I think I've used all of them" she grinned back, pulling him by the neck to lay down on the bed "Let me do my thing" she smiled as he lay back and let her do exactly that listening to her singing _**'And I'll take some time, just to be thankful, that I had days full of you'**_ she was woken four hours later by a ping on her phone, she jumped up to look at it and rolled her eyes

"Who was it?" he asked sleepily

"Oh just work" she threw the phone back down telling him, that was easier than telling him it was Don and then explaining all that, he was becoming a pest, and she was going to nip that in the bud next time she saw him. "Can I get an extra week?" she asked cheekily

"You want to keep me in bed?" he smiled

" ** _If you've got someone you like..."_** she sang to him making him smile

" ** _Don't you love when I come around"_** he turned singing

" ** _...feel something that's right somebody just tell somebody"_** she told him

" _ **Build you up then I take you down**_ " he pushed her back on the bed laughing

 **Month 10**

Sam hadn't seen Shawna for a while, he'd still not spoken to anyone about her random calls, which were pissing him off more than anything, she was demanding that he split with his wife before she came forward and told everything. It was a few kisses nothing more and Sam knew that was minor, but the fact that he'd actually kept the fact that it had happened away from Mercy he knew would destroy their trust he couldn't risk it. Mercy was already stressed about something and he was pissed that she wasn't talking to him about it, they were getting touchy with each other, to have that on top of this would finish them for sure he thought. He finally agreed to another long haul dig, he already knew Shawna was going to be on it, he'd expected to talk her down and get his life back on track, this really wasn't the time to take time out from home something was wrong.

Mercy had been getting constant calls from Don, constantly telling her that her husband was going to cheat and she needed to jump before she was pushed and how he'd be much better for her, it was totally stressing her out. Then to add to the mess he'd given her an ultimatum saying he'd waited long enough and he knew their kisses meant something if she didn't come clean, he was going to, she was spitting blood. To add to the stress every time she looked at Sam he was on his damn phone, shouting or angry but everything was alright when she'd ask and she knew he was lying, and why the hell would he do that? She'd finally agreed to meet with Don at a coffee shop near work, he was waiting eagerly when she got there that morning, she didn't want to but she'd felt something back then and it frightened her, she was in love with Sam, she knew this so what the hell was that. She tried her best to fend him off but his threats just got more outlandish, she somehow knew he had some screw loose somewhere, she promised another meeting soon, she needed to get a handle on how to deal with this properly, she allowed him to kiss her cheek and made her exit.

"Mercy" Sam walked into their apartment calling "I'm off again in two days"

"Two days?" she came out of the kitchen covered in cookie mix asking "They usually give you at least a weeks notice"

"I know babe but this space was going it's near the Boovet Island and you know that's one on my bucket list" he smiled "I'm excited"

"I'm excited for you babe, all our dreams coming true" she walked towards him taking his kiss "Hi" she pulled away long enough to say gazing into his eyes before wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him in again "I'm going to miss you"

"Hi" he smiled "I'm going to miss you too" before he took his kiss

"How long for?" she asked when they let each other up and she went back to the kitchen with him following

"They offered me two months but I said that would go right through our anniversary so I asked for two weeks"

"I'll be home" she smiled up at him

"Mercy" he looked into her eyes, his filled with tears for what he knew he needed to tell her "I need to tell you something" he stood in the kitchen telling her "I need to..." he looked around the room as if it were unfamiliar to him "I have feelings for someone else, it's nothing like what we have but I just feel like, I'm betraying you not saying anything" he walked away from her saying expecting the blow up

"I have feelings for someone too" he heard spinning him around

"Do you love him?" he shouted

"I don't think so" she looked at him awkwardly saying "It's just a feeling and as you said it's nothing like I feel for you"

"Sorry, I don't even know why I'm shouting, I'm just as damn bad" he stepped towards her saying

"Don't" she held her hand up at him telling him not to touch her

"I haven't done anything with her" he stopped his eyes puzzled at Mercy's move

"I have" she looked at him saying "I've kissed Don several times" she stood ashamed looking in his eyes

"I've kissed Shawna several times too, but I've done nothing else"

"I guess we both need this time to reflect on what's happening for us" she smiled awkwardly looking around the kitchen

"Mercy this isn't university, this shit matters, we're married"

"I know that Sam, but we still need to reflect, we need to work shit out, we'll talk when you get back" she told him, very aware of Don's recent threat, and Sam being mindful of where he'd left things with Shawna, nodded in agreement

 **'We Find Love' By Daniel Caesar**

The next two days were awkward to say the least _**'You don't love me any more, let's see how you like this song, I see you walking out that door, wonder why it took you so long'**_ she sung in her head as she followed him walking out the door to go see another woman "Mercy" He turned shocking her as he got to the door "I love you, you know that right, I mean..." he looked into her eyes telling her "I'm sure of that, that I love you, _**Ever since the day that I met you, I knew you were the girl of my dreams,**_ " he sung looking into her eyes "With all my heart babe"

"I hope so Sam" a tear fell down her face as she spoke "But we just need to sort our feelings out, we'll talk when you get back" she half smiled up at him before they hugged and parted company

Sam's journey to the airport was silent with Mercy on his mind, he knew exactly what she was thinking, singing at that moment because he was thinking the exact same thing ' _ **You don't love me any more, let's see how you like this song, we find love, we get up, and we fall down, we give up'**_ he hummed in his mind "Except we never give up" he smiled suddenly he knew what was important to him

 **Sam's Two Weeks**

"Finally" Shawna smiled when he stepped out the jeep near the camp "You've been avoiding me" she walked up to him saying, Sam was surprised at how his heart raced for seeing her

"Shawna" he smiled taking her hug

"Look before you say anything about my behaviour, I'm sorry I know you belong to someone else, but you know that saying the heart wants what the heart wants" she looked up at him saying "Well mine wants yours, and I guess I'll go to hell and back to get it"

"We need to talk" he looked down at her saying "I've got a big decision... Wade" he looked up smiling for seeing his old friend "Great to see you" he moved away from Shawna towards Wade smiling, she stood watching as they greeted each other "We need to talk" he told him looking back at Shawna as he walked away with Wade

"Sam" Shawna jumped in as they walked away from her saying "I need to speak to you first"

Sam looked at Wade, wondering what to do first for a second before Wade nodded him off to go speak to her "I'll see you later I believe we share a bunk" Wade smiled walking off and leaving them to it

"What is it?" he walked up to her asking

"Come sit down" she said showing him to her bunk

"Outside here will do" he looked at her suspiciously saying as they sat on the folding chairs outside her bunk

"You know my feelings for you, I just needed to tell you stuff before Wade gave you his version" she looked at him saying "Some might call me a loose woman, slut even but I've just been unlucky in love a few times" she smiled "I paint this picture of being all hard and self sufficient but I'm not and some of the things people say about me hurt, a lot" she smiled nervously. Sam couldn't help but smile at how cute that made her look, he'd never seen her in the picture she was painting of herself, he knew a bit about being unlucky in love, he'd been there so many times before Mercy, he looked back at her to see she was still talking he'd missed what she was saying

"Sorry" he said turning to give her conversation more attention

"So I guess I'm begging you to be the one to choose me" she smiled "I know your wife would be the victim in all this, but how much do you really care about her if you're here with me?"

"Wow" Sam told her pushing his hands out stopping her flow of thought "Seriously, you don't even know my wife let alone to be presuming to know what she may or may not be feeling" Sam felt defensive of this woman pushing his relationship to the back burner for him, if anyone was going to ever do that it was Mercy and him

"I didn't mean anything bad in saying that, but you are here with me"

"Because I love my job" he told her

"Yeah but there were many other digs you could have gone on"

"There were, but this one is on my bucket list" he smiled "Shawna" he looked at her rolling his eyes "I told my wife about you before I came on this trip, I'll admit I told her I maybe had a small thing for you, but it will never be enough for me to leave my wife"

"I'll take now, just when we're on digs, I'll be your woman and your wife will still be your wife at home"

"So while my wife's making our home, you expect me to be here with you doing wrong things?"

"Its an alternative"

"No it isn't, I made a promise, if I was ever going to sleep with anyone else for whatever reason, I'd divorce her, even if it was just for a night"

"What kind of stupid promise is that?"

"One filled with respect I guess" he looked at her saying "So I guess this is me saying a very big no to what you have to offer" he told her getting up and walking away to his bunker _**'But we could never be ...'**_ he hummed over and over again as he walked

"Let me guess" Wade laughed as he walked in "She's not a slag like everyone on earth says, she's just looking for love and right now the only place she can find it is in another married man's trousers, Right?" he asked

"Something like that" Sam laughed

"She is a slag bro, I'm not even going to joke about that, and she will if you let her, break up your marriage, she's a fatal attraction type"

"Really?" Sam sat down asking "Wade I just told my wife I have feelings for the bitch, we're on some hard rocks because of it and she's a fucking slag?" he held his head saying

"And don't think that was the end of whatever happened out there just, she's a predator, you should have asked me as soon as she started her shit" he laughed "I'm laughing but I'm not Sam this is serious"

There were no cosy chats for Sam and Shawna for the rest of the trip, Sam and Wade made sure of that, but she sent him a text when they finally parted company at the airport, he didn't read it just deleted it, he needed his wife bad, he got off the plane to his phone ringing happy to see Mel's name flash up, they didn't speak often any more "Mel" he said happy until he heard her tone

"I've heard what's going on between you two, didn't I tell you everything was just going too damn fast, I begged you to wait and now we have this situation" she shouted at him

"What's going on between us?"

"Don't give me that Sam, you guys have been seeing other people, want a damn divorce, and apparently all that love you pair were showing, less than a year ago I might add, has fucking gone"

"None of that is accurate" he shouted down the phone "And how the fuck are you going to be telling me anything about Mercy?" he huffed "You know that subjects off limits, who told you all that?"

"Mercy's been talking to Dean, a lot"

"When did you and Dean become pals?"

"We're not pals our best friends just happen to be married to each other"

"And that's as far into my relationship as you go" he told her looking at the phone "I'm off home to see my wife, bye" he clipped the phone off telling her angry for her intrusion, making his way home

 **Mercy's Two Weeks**

Mercy chest lifted as she saw Don walk into the coffee shop, her and Sam's favourite one, she'd already ordered their drinks and was sitting ready to have this awkward conversation. It seemed like hours ago, but Sam had only set off less than an hour ago and she couldn't wait to grab her coat and head to this place, determined to sort her shit out "Don" she waved catching his attention "I've got you a drink" she smiled as he walked towards her

"Mercy" he smiled sitting down and grabbing his drink "Thanks" he held it up saying "And thanks for meeting me again too"

"Look Don, I have no intention of leaving my husband" she pointed her finger at him saying "And you have to stop with the threats"

"I think I'm the one in the position, to spout conditions don't you" he stared at her saying

"I've told him about you" she stared back at him saying "I don't need you threatening me"

"You told him so, now we can be together" he said excitedly

"I just said I have no intention of leaving my husband for you, and all the mystery or whatever that was I felt went as soon as I told him" she looked at him blankly

"I thought we were getting together here?" he asked

"No I'm warning you to leave me alone, I've told him but I haven't mentioned your threats, you won't like him if I do"

"Are you daring me to bring it?"

"I guess if you carry on you'll be forcing me to bring it" she laughed getting up

"Don't dare me" he smiled a snarl on his face telling her not to test this

"I dare you" she smiled before turning and walking away "That felt fucking good" she rubbed her hands together saying before finding her car and going back home _**''Let's see how you like this song, we find love, we get up, and we fall down, we give up'**_ she hummed as she drove along "But we never give up" she smiled pulling into their home garage. Mercy's time was focused on work after that meeting, in the evenings she spent a lot of time talking to Dean about the situation she'd found herself in and what she was going to do about it.

"Just checking up on you girl" Dean said when she picked up the phone in the middle of rushing around cleaning and getting things ready for Sam's return "A little bird tells me your hubby's coming back today" he giggled down the phone

"Who's that birdie?" she asked alarms bells going off for her "Dean please tell me you haven't been relaying everything we've talked about back to Mel"

"Only the things that could help this situation" he told her

"No" she screamed "I told you he was super sensitive about Mel knowing our damn business"

"Why she's his best friend isn't she, like me she'll be wanting to do everything she can to keep you guys together"

"I don't think that's the kind of relationship Mel and I have Dean" she rolled her eyes telling him making a note to herself never to divulge anything to him about their life ever again

"I'm sorry Mercy, I feel like I've made things worse instead of better but I really did mean well" he sulked down the phone

Mercy couldn't help but imagine his sad face, making her chuckle down the phone "It's fine, we'll get over it" she laughed "Got to go he's on his way up" she told him quickly putting the phone down

 **Sam & Mercy **

"Hi" he walked in, his arms open waiting for a running Mercy to jump into "God I missed you" he held her to him his eyes closed just taking in the feeling of possessing all that love "I'm glad to be home" he kissed her head telling her

"I missed you too" she finally looked up at him smiling "And I'm sorry about Dean, I just found out what he was doing" her eyes begging him for forgiveness

"That's fine, I've already spoken to Mel" he rolled his eyes saying "Can we talk first?" he asked as she pulled him towards the bedroom, she stopped and turned to look at him "I just need to say what's in my head" she smiled and went towards the couch and got comfortable waiting for him to speak "I think Shawna was some sort of infatuation, there really was nothing there, I'm sorry to have put you through that, I guess I'd just spent too much time with her at some point and she got into my head"

"I understand that I guess it was some of the same for me Don's a real smooth talker you know and somewhere in there it got clouded, but then I see you and I know where I need to be" she smiled "And I want to forget all about our little glitch and get on with our lives chalk it up as a life experience" she looked at him saying "And I'm sorry too"

" ** _We find love"_** he sung

" ** _We get up"_** she smiled running with his hand in hers across the room

" **A** ** _nd we fall down"_** they fell on their bed laughing as they sung

"But we never give up" Sam warned

"Never" she buzzed as they fell into each other, their love making sealing an unsaid promise that they'd always be together no matter what, when or who tried to pull them apart


	2. Chapter 2

**Month 12**

Finally they'd reached their first Anniversary, they hadn't been able to book anything special, well, out of the ordinary because Sam was arriving back from a dig late that afternoon and Mercy was in the office all day, and to be truthful after three weeks on a dig it was all they could do to maybe eat something before they fell into bed anyway

Mercy had got dressed at work and gone straight to the restaurant because Sam wanted to eat early and if she'd have gone home before the meal it was going to be a midnight finish. She was sitting waiting for Sam to turn up on her second glass of wine and her third bowl of nuts looking at her phone again wondering if his flight had been delayed "Babe" he shouted across the room as their eyes met in the crowded restaurant, walking fast towards her

"Babe" she got up and flew into his arms "I missed you" she said in his ear as he held onto her

"I missed you too" he pulled away to look at her saying, grabbing her lips, he couldn't resist them just then "So much" he looked into the eyes saying a smile on their faces for seeing each other again "Let's eat and get out of here" he told her watching her sit down as he took his coat off and fiddled with the pocket for a while "Here" he smiled "Happy Anniversary"

"Babe" she jumped up taking the square flat box and giving him a kiss "Thank you" she smiled "Can I open it?"

"Yeah sure it's yours" he laughed as he watched her pick the lid up and gasp at the gold rimmed photo album "Paper yeah?"

"Huumm" she nodded as she looked through at their memories of the past year, some photo's she didn't even know he'd taken, laughing at their first morning together after the wedding, her angry face when they argued about the baby thing "You" she looked up at him saying when she saw herself asleep in their bed "You captured every emotion" she laughed "Thank you"

"I'm still to catch that ugly cry you talk about" he laughed

"Yours is at home" she told him laughing

"I hope so" he wiggled his eyebrows telling her

"Food"she said fast changing the mood

They'd eaten food and were in the process of grabbing their coats when Sam's phone rang "It's Stan" he told her flicking it open, he very rarely got calls off the boss, he'd never been in trouble at work, Mercy looked on concerned until she saw a smile on his face "Will do Stan" he told him finally finishing the call "Apparently he sent a memo about the sponsors for that Pitcairn Island dig, I've been asking about for the past year, they're in town tonight, sorry babe we've got to do some meet and greet, normally I wouldn't ask, but apparently your boss is there too so it might be beneficial"

"You're so lucky I changed off at work" she got up saying as Sam threw a tip on the table and they left

"You could wear nothing and still look better than anyone I know" he smiled at her

"I should hope so Mr Evans" she stepped into the car telling him "I feel funny meeting your work colleagues" she smiled

"They're not scary, just boring, so sorry in advance" he laughed

" _ **let's see how you like this song"**_ she sang and he knew she was nervous _ **"You need someone you adore, find a place where you might belong"**_ she carried on, he looked at her and grabbed her hand joining in with the song

 _ **"Ever since the day that I met you, my world's been spinning out of control, I just need you to hold"**_ he sang smiling back at her, they drove in silence for the rest of the journey, thoughtfully revisiting conversations they'd had and feeling happy "We're here" he smiled jumping out to let her out, she got out and straightened herself up before grabbing his arm and walking into the building

"Sam" Wade called as he walked in, Sam made a b-line towards him with Mercy still attached

"Wade" he shook his hand "You remember Mercy" he looked to his left at her saying

"I do but I'd forgotten how beautiful she was, you're one lucky mother fu... sorry your a lucky man" he smiled red faced at Mercy

"Thank you" Sam laughed as Wade shook Mercy's hand "So were are the wigs?" he asked looking around

"In the board room, we might just get our dig" Wade rubbed his hands together excitedly

"Right" Sam looked at Mercy saying, thinking he didn't want to bore her "Should we go get a drink?"

"You go leave your wife here with me" Wade laughed

"No way, it's our anniversary today, I just got back, not an inch" he laughed clutching her hand in his arm to drag her with him.

"Happy Anniversary" Wade shouted as they made their way to the bar, got their drinks and went to speak to some of Sam's other colleagues each one impressed more with his wife than they were with him, he wasn't phased he was impressed with her too, she fell easily into conversation with everyone he introduced her to.

"Hello Sam" Mercy heard as she spoke to Stan and her Boss; Stephan, unable to turn to take in the voice as she was leading her current conversation

"Shawna wha..." was all she heard ringing through her ear as she stood talking, her concentration had gone all she wanted to do was turn round and slap this bitch hard, so much so she was shaking

"Babe" she heard as she felt Sam's arm slide around her waist "Sorry guys" he looked up at Stan and Stephan saying looking back at Mercy as he felt her shaking in his arm "Babe this is Shawna" he told her as she looked up at him smiling, he knew it was false, but there was a game to play

"Finally" Shawna screeched "It's about time I met this little miss perfect" she hissed as Sam looked around to see what attention had been drawn

"Shawna behave your damn self" he hissed back, Mercy's expression had moved from kill a bitch, through shock to disgust, now she was shaking with anger again

"It that it really?" she snarled pointing at Mercy as she spoke; this woman, despite the attitude had soft features, a beautiful figure and brilliantly white teeth, her blond hair tied back and curly, her hands larger than you'd expect and her eyes the most dazzling grey

"Shawna this is my wife Mercy" he said, realising where he was, wanting to keep himself civil, he pulled Mercy to him as he spoke to the woman in front of them "It's actually our first anniversary today so you could just say congratulations"

"Sam?" she asked her face still saying she couldn't believe Mercy was her competition

That did it for him he lost it, he let Mercy go and went close to Shawna pulling her hand to him with so much force her whole body followed "if you were a fucking man you'd be on the floor right now, that shit you've got in your head pertaining to me is never going to fucking happen, do you hear me, so drop it"

"Shit I thought you were going to kiss me again" she laughed rubbing her hand, where he'd just let it go

Sam went to go for her again, but Mercy, aware that everyone was watching by now, grabbed him "Sam I want to go home" she pulled him back telling him

"Sorry Mercy I didn't know she was going to be here" he said grabbing his wife's hand and making for the door

"Mercy" she heard as they rushed through the door looking up to see Don letting them through, she dare not stop Sam was already looking for someone to punch, she barely smiled and carried on letting herself be dragged along

"That's the type of girl you like is it?" she asked when they got in the car

"Where the hell has that come from, I'm married to you, you're my type of girl" he sat looking at her "Mercy" he called when she wouldn't look back at him "Mercy she means nothing to me babe, I don't lie to you"

"You pulled her and she thought you were going to kiss her"

"She said that for effect, I told you I'd kissed her a few times"

"It's me Sam" she sighed "It's just well... now I have a face to attach all your shit to it's a bit real now I guess"

"I don't think this thing about keeping our work life separate was a good idea babe, I think we need to mingle in both worlds, whenever we can, we leave ourselves open for so much, and I can't do this every time"

"Lets go home get your present unwrapped" she smiled "I need to forget"

"Okay" he said his mind on why she'd leave that just like that, but relieved that she had

They got in the door and as usual Sam went to the study first thing, Mercy smiled as she watched him, she'd left his present in there, she quickly ran to their bedroom to get ready for his response

"Mercy" he walked back out the study with a bottle with a letter in it, to an empty room, he smiled as he opened the bottle and took the letter out sitting down to read his Anniversary present

 _Hubby_

 _Your the sexiest man I've ever known, when you walk past me my heart races, the way you kiss the back of my neck demands that I take all my clothes off and give myself to you. Mmm as I write this I can see your muscles under your shirt flexing making me lick my lips, giving me the most delicious thoughts, I might tell you about those one day. You know my favourite moment is when our bodies fuse, when my inner self tastes your inner self, I can feel it now, I have a vivid imagination when it comes to us "You hear me saying your name and laughing right?" I already know our night's going to be amazing, they always are, did I remember to thank you for that last mind blowing orgasm "Thanks" the thought of waking up to you all stiff and ready for me in the morning makes me want to hurry and get tonight over with, but then you know I need you slowed down too, real slowed down._

 _Now come to bed_

 _Do you need a name?_

Sam was laughing all through the letter, it was paper alright with the right amount of moist, to get him moving, he just about got to the end before he jumped up and made his way to their bedroom "I came to get my present" he laughed pulling her off the dresser chair and marching her towards the bed as he kissed her neck "Let's hear you noise" he nuzzled into her neck everything about him demanding attention

"I'd say our paper anniversary was a great success" Sam smiled as Mercy jumped up to visit the bathroom for the third time that morning "Are you alright babe?" he asked at how fast she'd gone off

"I'm fine just a bit sore" she shouted back "And it burns so I'm doing a bit at a time" she giggled

"I'm not even sorry, just near satisfied" he laughed "Let it all out this time" he warned and of course he showed her why when she got back into bed

"What do you say you come with me, if you're available on my next dig?" he surprised her saying a few hours later while they were in the shower

"I think I'd be bored" she looked up at him saying

"I mean I wouldn't stop on sight, we could go to a hotel, I'd like that and I think we just need some extra time"

"Are we still in trouble?"

"Not trouble, but I'd just feel better with you around right now, you could shop and stuff while I was off and I'd do shorter days and stuff"

"Okay" she smiled tiptoeing up to kiss him "I'll see what I can do when you get your next date"

"Thanks" he bent to kiss her back

"Did I say thanks for that last mind blowing orgasm?" he asked smiling

"Quite a few times Mr, stop it"

"Spoil sport" he slapped her butt saying as she walked out the shower cubicle, she turned giving him a sexy look

"Cheat" she smirked as he ran out after her, she screamed running around the house, unsure if she wanted him to catch her or she wanted to catch him, but sure it was all going down again _ **"We find love, we get up, and we fall down, we give up, we find love, we get up, and we fall down"**_ she sang running round, Sam walking around after her waiting for her to tire, he always won this game , they knew it, he walked around following her with a smile on his face

"We never give up" he grabbed her saying, she laughed rolling her eyes, stopping to look at his lips, she buzzed inside as he licked his lips, he was making her wait and she didn't like it, she flung herself towards him and he held her even closer to him than she was before but still not touching lips "I mean it Mercy whatever happens, we never give up, I couldn't lose you, I refuse to lose you"

"Never" she whispered as her eyes closed making him smile before he gave her what she wanted

"Slow enough for you?" he asked as they lay exhausted and totally satisfied some hours later

 **'Best Part' by Daniel Caesar ft H.E.R**

Everything went along just fine for the next month, Mercy was working from home a lot as Sam hadn't been assigned and life for them was almost back to University days without the distance, Mercy sat in the study one day messing with Sam's guitar trying to strum some notes and make sense of his scribbles

"What are you doing?" he finally said making her aware of him sitting listening

She laughed "I was just trying to play this tune you'd written down and create some words to it"

"It's already a song I was trying to get some notes down to use, I like parts of the music" he walked over to her saying

"And I'd like some words, what's the song?"

"I'm surprised you don't know it" he took the guitar off her and started playing the song

"Oh" she said humming as she got the tune "It didn't come out like that for me" she laughed watching him put the guitar down, knowing that look in his eyes, smiling as he grabbed hold of her, she knew he was going to lay her out right there " _ **You don't know babe, when you hold me, and kiss me slowly, it's the sweetest thing"**_ she sang making him smile before he took her lips

"Is there something going on with you babe?" he let her go asking

"Like?"

"Well I noticed you changed your hair colour the other week and you've changed your lipstick, even though you know I like that cherry one and now this" he looked at her from head to toe saying "Why are you changing yourself?"

"I'm not I just fancied a change"

"As long as you're doing that for yourself babe because you know my preference already" he grabbed her to him smiling as he spoke before singing " _ **And it don't change, if I had it my way, you would know that you are, you're the coffee that I need in the morning, you're my sunshine in the rain when it's pouring, won't you give yourself to me, give it all, oh"**_ as his hands wondered to the warm parts of her body "What's up?" he asked while he touched her

"Okay I'm maybe feeling a bit insecure with Shawna being Shawna" she rolled her eyes telling him "And well if we should ever meet again I just want to be ready the next time, that's all"

"Ready?" he pulled his hand away asking

"Yeah ready" she nodded choosing not to elaborate on that "Can we get back to the giving yourself to me, and just give it all" he didn't answer he just carried on with what he'd already started

"Sam" she called a week later, while she was at the office "They've given me a week off in a week, can you do that?"

"Sorry babe I was waiting till you got home to say but I've got a dig coming up, I need you to see if you can change that to two weeks time"

"I'll be pushing my luck but I'll try"

"Please" he begged down the phone

"Will Shawna be there?" she asked nervously

Sam rolled his eyes for that woman still being on his wife's mind "I don't know, we never know who's said they want in until we get there"

"I'll speak to Stephan" she told him ending the call shortly after, she was scared for her actions with this damn woman, she'd never felt so threatened before about anything, or so protective, she actually felt a chill go through her at the thought of having to, but she would beat that bitch down for her man.

Sam sat thinking about his conversation with Mercy, she was seriously worrying him, surely she knew she had nothing to worry about as far as he was concerned, and what did she mean by ready the other day. He was happy he'd have her with him this trip, at least he could keep an eye on her, she was planning something and although he saw what he thought she might do as a big turn on, her getting hurt wasn't going to be any part of any plan she thought she'd got.

 **Two Weeks Later**

Everything was in excited mode, Mercy had managed to get the two weeks off, they'd booked a five star hotel, everything was packed and for the first time since they'd been married they were leaving the country together.

"Grab that sack babe it's got all my tool in" he laughed knowing she couldn't lift it

"Sam" she moaned as she tried to lift it with difficulty "What the hell" she stood looking at the bag asking

"I'll get it babe" he laughed "I was only joking"

"No, no it's fine, I'll get it" she fanned his hand off putting all her strength behind her to eventually lift the sack "You carry everything else" she looked back at the three heavier cases sitting on the floor, it was her turn to laugh, the flight was quiet and 14 hours later, with one stop they were at the dig

"God this is baron" Mercy laughed as the car drove through the deserted country side, an hour later still looking at leafless trees, dust and bramble "Where are we going?"

"To the hotel"

"To find a bedroom?"

"You seem to have a fixation on bedrooms that's the third time you've mentioned that since we landed" he smiled

"I'm glad you're counting, I think I'm excited about being in another bed"

"What you're tired?"

"As if" she rolled her eyes telling him

They got to the hotel checked in, ordered a table for the evening and went directly to their room "Strip" she told him as soon as the door was shut, she leaned on it watching him do as she'd asked "God you're still the sexiest man I've ever known" she drooled as she watched him undress, he smiled before he went into full monte mode.

"Slow right" he laughed as he walked towards her, flipping her to face the door she'd leaned on, spreading her legs with his hands as they wondered up her skirt, pulling her underwear aside as he opened her up and fused with her body

"Mmm" he heard her gasp making him smile "Faster" she begged as he moved inside her,slapping her on her butt as he moved "Sam" she turned her head to say for the sting on her butt as he grabbed her lips, telling her he was in charge without speaking. She loved it when he got like this all he man on her shit, she loved being taken

"Faster right" he let her lips go to say as he hand wondered round to her button, she jerked for the sensation

"Harder" she pushed against him telling him, as her hand grabbed his butt to pull him in more, she needed more "Sam cover up" she looked back at him saying

"I want babies Mercy" he breathed heavy telling her

"Sam you promised me" he felt her pull away from him, he pulled her back onto him with force "Sam" she whispered "You promised" she told him again as she felt him pull out, walking them over to the case in the middle of the room, unzipping the side and taking out their protection

"Better?" he asked as she watched him put it on

"Yes thank you" she just about got out before her flipped her over the couch and slammed into her, her noise bringing a smile to his face

"Harder?" he asked but didn't wait for an answer before he ripped her underwear off her and slapped her again, giggling at her vexed face, he didn't care she'd said no again to their baby, and she was going to pay for that to his satisfaction, he wrapped his hand in her hair and pulled it

"Sam" she shouted "Softer"

"Don't tell me what to do" he hissed at her

"Stop with this angry sex Sam" she moaned

"You made me this way" he hissed, she knew better than to carry that conversation on, she let him do what he needed, knowing at the end of all this he was going to lick it better anyway, she reeled as he moved the couch with every thrust, not stopping until his anger was out "Babe" he whispered as he grabbed hold of her hips and stayed there for a while until his body relaxed, dropping to his knees as he spread her wide and brought her to peak stopping when her legs gave way and she fell forward onto the couch

That afternoon they read some brochures, made some plans for visits and had their booked dinner later on, returning to their hideaway for the evening, they needed sleep, Sam needed to do the three hour drive to work in the morning. They woke up early the next morning, had breakfast together before Sam left for work, he was only doing five hours each day and although Mercy had planned things to do, she took the opportunity to chill, ordering lunch in her room and binge watching her favourite drama

Nearly twelve hours later Sam returned to a sleeping Mercy, crashed out on the couch with the TV still on, he smiled at the picture, grabbed a drink and set about ordering some food before jumping in the shower, coming out looking as chilled as her. He sat in the chair opposite her watching her sleep for a while _**'I just wanna see, I just wanna see how beautiful you are, you know that I see it, I know you're a star, where you go I follow, no matter how far, if life is a movie, oh you're the best part, oh, you're the best part, oh, best part'**_ he sung in his head as he watched her, finally grabbing his journal to update it

"Hi" Mercy opened her eyes a while later to see him sitting there "You should have woke me, we had plans"

"Hi" he smiled as he watched her walk over to him for her kiss, he was happy to give it to her pulling her down onto his lap to take that a bit further "I'm sorry about last night"

"You said that already" she smiled looking around the room, he smiled because he knew she had something to ask and he knew what it was

"No she wasn't" he told her "Now go get dressed we have a table booked"

She didn't move she sat looking at him "Thanks for that, but did you have a good day?"

"Yes I did, made even better for coming back here and seeing you laying there" he kissed her again telling her "Go get dressed" he jerked her off his lap saying "We have minutes" he smiled at her sour face as she got up to do as he's asked "Wade and Simon are coming to join us, you don't mind do you babe?" he asked smiling as Mercy turned to look at him her face saying fucking off with a sarcastic smile on it "I'll take that as a no then" he giggled

Twenty minutes later Mercy emerged from their bedroom in a classy black dress hugging her figure so tight Sam felt a ping of jealousy, hair up in a neat bun with red high heeled shoes to finish the look strapped up to the knee, her make up light and flawless ' _ **If you love me won't you say something, if you love me won't you, won't you'**_ she stood smiling at him singing

 _ **" You're the best part"**_ he sang back at her as she grabbed his hand and they left for dinner

 **'Loose' by Daniel Caesar**

They were a few minutes early they sat in the bar waiting for the rest of the party to arrive "You guys better not be talking shop the whole damn night" she told him as she fixed her hair for the fourth time

"With you sitting there to look at, they may not speak at all" he laughed

"Who's Simon I don't think I've met him before?" she asked

"He's been on a few digs with Wade and I in the early days and he just happens to be..."

"Sam" they heard as they both span around "Sorry" Wade mouthed as they looked at him quizzically

"Wade" Sam got up saying leaving Mercy sitting on the stool

"Sam" Simon smiled from behind Wade as they greeted each other "Sorry I ended up being talked into bringing the ex" he smiled not knowing any of the history, Sam's eyes showed panic as he quickly looked back at Mercy, he knew she'd be thinking he'd lied earlier with Shawna turning up

"Mercy you know Wade" he smiled at her "And this is Simon he was like our coach when we were putting the hours in and of course you've met Shawna Simon's ex before" he pointed at her coming towards them

"Sorry she's half cut already" Simon informed Mercy as they watched her walking towards them wobbling

"Which generally means her mouth is not her own so ignore her, I mean totally" Wade told Mercy making her laugh

"Are you laughing at me" Shawna pointed at Mercy as she walked towards them

"No she isn't, I was and she joined in" Wade told her still laughing

"Just don't" she said as Mercy looked at Sam and rolled her eyes, this was going to be a damn night

"I guess we need to get dinner started" Mercy looked around the group saying, taking Wade's advice and totally ignoring Shawna, jumping down off her stool, they managed to change the seating to five and got a round table, Shawna was cut off from getting the seat on the other side of Sam and opted in the end for the seat opposite him, smiling as she looked up to see Mercy seething.

"So Mercy" Simon pipped up "Sam tells me your with the Foreign Service, what do you do there?" he asked genuinely interested

"There's a lot to it, but I get asked that question so many time's I've got it down to a sentence" she laughed

"And?" Shawna butted in her hand in the air "The question was what do you do, not what questions you're asked" she tutted

Mercy cut her eye and followed Wade's instructions "I attend diplomat meetings and interact with foreign governments" she smiled "Obviously the detail is confidential so I have to stop there I'm afraid" she looked at Sam saying, the look on her face telling him she had very little rope left for the other woman at the table

"And I guess you know what we do" Simon smiled, looking at Sam

"Very much so" she smiled as Sam grabbed her hand

"Should we order?" Sam asked the party trying to get things over with as quickly as possible

"I think you're right by the way Sam" Shawna looked between Mercy and him saying "She does need make up"

"What?" Sam screeched "We never had that conversation" he looked at Mercy saying

"Same applies to you Sam, ignore the drunk" Wade told him, Sam bit his bottom lip and pressed on making their order and getting some wine served before the table was free to speak again

"So I know you guys were dying to get on the Pitcairn dig, any news" Simon asked before tasting his wine "Good choice by the way" he held it up at Mercy saying

"Tart" Shawna said tasting hers "Talking about tarts, I'm guessing that fanny's not as tight as you'd like it any more is it?" she looked at Simon "Having your sprogs bust out of it and everything"

"My wife's insides are my business" Simon told her "And you'll do best to keep out of my business" he snapped at her

"Opps not a good time" she covered her mouth saying "But you guys seem to have got your timing right tonight" she looked over at Mercy telling her

"Timing?" Mercy asked looking at Sam

"I don't know babe" he shrugged his shoulders telling her

"You don't know babe" Shawna laughed "How ironic" she snarled "I mean it's still not the right time for that family you so desperately want am I right Sam?" she asked as Mercy looked on in shock pulling her hand away from Sam's, this information was too near the bone "As I thought nothings changed except.. I'm even more willing now than I was then" she smiled over her glass as she finished

Sam's face red with anger at Shawna putting that conversation out there in front of Mercy "That's... she's twisted that babe" was all he could find to say to Mercy's horrified face

"Did he tell you he'd broken your promise?"

"What promise?" Mercy asked, watching Sam close his eyes at that knowing she was going to tell her something else that was just for their ears

"That you guys would get divorced before you cheated on each other" she took pleasure in telling her

"That's a lie" Mercy stood up telling her

"Really so how would I know about that mole just under his pants line, mingled in with his pubic hair?" she asked as everyone looked on, Mercy looked at Sam for a second before grabbing her bag and leaving the table and restaurant for the hotel room

"Thank you very fucking much" Sam slammed the table hissing at Shawna "Guy's I got to go, maybe abandon the dig, this shit..." he walked off saying

"Shawna that was disgusting" Simon shouted at her "You've turned out to be such a bitch, I really don't know what I ever saw in you" he got up telling her "How did you know about the mole?"

"I peeped on him in the camp showers" she laughed "But the bitch really doesn't trust him if she believes me, so she don't deserve him"

"That's so fucked up" Wade shook his head saying getting up himself "You're paying" he told her as he walked away too

 **Sam & Mercy**

"What are you doing?" he walked into their hotel room asking as he watched Mercy throwing things in her case "Babe, where are you going?" he walked towards her asking

"You lied to me Sam" she threw the comb she had in her hand at him saying "The one thing we said would break us, you lied"

"Babe I didn't lie, she's lying" he grabbed hold of her saying

"How did she know about your mole?" she screamed at him "And don't tell me you don't fucking know, that answer is unacceptable to me right now"

"Seriously babe" he shook her to get her to listen to him "I don't know, we've never been that close or that naked with each other" Mercy rolled her eyes at him giving her the answer she'd just told him wasn't acceptable

"Do you think I'm a joke Sam?" her face wet with tears "Do you think I'm a fucking joke?"

"Babe..."

"Let me go" she looked at his hands holding her tight "Let me go" she looked in his eyes shouting as Sam's hands fell away from her "Fuck this" she grabbed her small case and headed to the door, Sam ran to the door standing in front of it "You can do what you want with the rest of it , I'm done" she stood in front of him saying waiting for him to move from the door for her to get out

"Let me know where you're going I'll call when you've calmed down"

"Really?" she stared at him asking

"Really" he crossed his arms in front of him saying, he was getting mad now "Where are you going?" he asked as she stood defiant to answering his question "I never stop you doing much Mercy, but if you don't tell me where you're going, seriously, you are not getting past this door"

"Away from you" she finally hissed at him, he rolled his eyes and refused to move "Fine" she walked away from him saying slamming the bedroom door as she walked through it clearly telling him he wasn't welcome, she stayed in there while Sam threw himself on the couch listening to her shouting about him for a while before he put the TV on to drown her out before he started reacting, poured himself a drink he set the bottle on the table in front of him, his mind screaming before he threw the glass full down him throat, he sat in thought about how the trip had started off so romantic and got to this, he'd already told himself he was taking tomorrow off, this needed to get sorted, there was no point speaking to her when she was in this mood, but she'd climb back off that wall soon and he'd be able to get her to see reason, he fell asleep sometime during the night.

He jumped out of his sleep to his phone ringing "Sam" he heard Wade say on the other end of the phone "You need to get you're butt here, the investors for the dig are coming, they'll be here in less than an hour, I'll cover but get here" he said, before Sam could reply the phone was dead. He raked his hand through his hair, he really could do without this today of all days, and everyone depended on everyone to make these things happen, it really wouldn't look good if he wasn't where he'd been assigned. He jumped up to go tell Mercy he'd need to go to work but he'd be back early to sort this out, opening the bedroom door he was shocked that the bed was made "Mercy" he shouted through the room as he went towards the bathroom "Mercy" he said again opening the door to find no one.

Looking around the room he saw her large suitcase, the small one missing, he dragged his phone out and called her to hear her phone ringing near him picking it up and wondering where she'd go without taking her phone "The tracker" he hissed knowing she'd have left it because she didn't know how to turn it off "Shit" he sat on the bed defeated "She could only have gone home" he rubbed his temples telling himself "Fucking Shawna" he banged the bed saying

He sat for a while trying to figure out what to do; not lose his job or find his damn wife, he opted for going into work and explaining the situation and hopefully gaining sympathy enough to get time off to go look for her, if that failed he'd call Stan for clearance, he'd never asked for anything before, he should say yes

He got up and had a shower, coming out to grab his clothes for work he found a note from Mercy, his heart felt heavy, so much so he bounced off the bed a few times before he actually sat, he smiled thinking of the last letter she'd sent him not too long ago, scared to open it but needing to because it might tell him where she was. After some consideration he finally decided to open the letter he sat slowly peeling it open his mind confused with what to think for what he might find "Sam" he frowned "No dear, my love, hubby nothing just Sam, bad start" he shook his head before fully unfolding the letter to start reading

 _Sam_

 _I smile as I write this note, it really wasn't that long ago I was getting into my wedding dress, singing proudly 'who would have thought I'd get you' ready to walk down the aisle and marry the man of my dreams. Seriously on that day I felt like the luckiest woman in the world, I mean who gets everything they ever wanted on one day. I know I, sorry we, promised to stand by each other forever, and I truly meant it, but this turmoil year has sucked the life out of me and all I know is that something between us has changed and I need space to make sense of it._

 _I wish I could hand on heart say all this was your fault, my eyes and heart strayed too and that leads me to believe that maybe, we're trying too hard at this thing we think is love, I'm grateful for all the moments we've shared, and the beautiful memories we've created in our short lives together, in those moment I was truly happy and I hope you were too._

 _I know you can't see it right now, but eventually you'll thank me for leaving when I did, it will make us both stronger people, I need to believe that. However as we've proved, even the strongest fires burn out, we're living proof that even good marriages can fade into nothing but also that love does exist and I have that for you always regardless of our future circumstances, distance or boundaries_

 _I look back at the past five years from our chance meeting in Oklahoma, those painful University days, our first dance on our wedding day and all I can think to say is thank you for those good times, hard time, laughter and even these cries, Thank you for helping shape the strong person I've had to be today and will continue to be and for being a part of my life, even if it was only for a short while, you left an impact_

 _Bye Sam_

"God" he looked up to the heavens his face full of tears at what he'd just read, he'd actually laughed when he read the part when she said she was leaving, he thought it was some sort of joke. He sat for a while looking around the room, all her important things had gone, she was gone, he wanted to blame Shawna for the whole damn thing, in fact he started to, but on reading the letter again he realised Mercy hadn't even mentioned the incident. There had been doubts on both side within the first year, he had considered leaving her for Shawna and who knows what he would have seriously done had Wade not eventually told him about her history, he found that doubt Mercy spoke about and cried because even after all that, he still wanted her to be his wife.

Sam eventually got dressed and went to work as if nothing was happening for him "Mercy alright?" Simon asked as they assembled for their briefing

"Yeah she's fine, but she went back home this morning, hence the late arrival, before she killed we know who and lost her damn job" he smiled, that smile leaving his face as Shawna entered the room

"Sam" she smiled "No Mercy?"

"She doesn't work here" he snapped **_"_ _If you ever start to wonder, why all the rain and all the thunder follows her around, you better cut that girl loose" '_** _I need to do that for my own damn sanity'_ he cut his eye at her thinking. He listened to the briefing, did his job and returned home two weeks later

 **Mercy**

She knew she was no match for Sam strength wise, he'd have lifted her up and put her in that bedroom if she hadn't walked, and his touch would have weakened her, she had to outwit him, she'd finally calmed down and cracked the door to see him downing whisky and sat watching as glass six slid down his throat, she couldn't stop her tears from falling for what she was about to do "A letter" she whispered getting up to grab pen and paper to write her feelings down. Looking at the album he'd brought her for their anniversary she smiled "We had some good times" she told herself as she wrote her last letter to her soon to be ex-husband , it took a while because of the tears.

She didn't actually know how many drinks Sam had taken out that bottle by the time she looked up again but what she did know was that he was asleep and this was her time, she didn't want to risk running with a large case so she just grabbed the small one she'd packed earlier and left

She sat on the plane emotional, looking at the clock on the wall in front of her "He'll be waking up around now" she told herself as more tears left her eyes as she imagined him finding her missing and panicking, rushing to his phone to call her to find her phone sitting on the side before jumping into his shoes to run outside and do a he man search, she felt horrible and actually ugly cried right there on the plane in front of everyone when she pictured him finding her note "That was it, it was done" she finally wiped her face saying **"What are you, a coward? who are you helping? You got the power, then do what you said you can, and do it for him, better cut that boy loose, set him free leave him be"**

She got off the plane, went home collected some more things and called Jean "Can I stay with you for a few weeks Jean and I know you want to know but no questions please" she cried down the phone

"Mercy just get here" Jean told her concerned as she listened to Mercy cry before putting the phone down

She threw her bags in the car and sat looking at the steering wheel, finally looking at the clock "He'd be calling me now" she looked at it thinking he was maybe having his dinner right now, and cried again "You called this Mercy Evans" she shook herself saying turning the key and driving over to Jean's **"Leave him be"**

She'd got the spare room ready for her and although Mercy went through all the pleasantries, she soon found sanctuary in the bedroom, crying herself to sleep holding a pillow to her chest "You alright Mercy" Jean came running into the room shouting at one point

"What?" she jumped up asking

"Is something wrong with Sam, you keep shouting for him?"

"Sam, no nothing's wrong with Sam" she flopped back into bed telling her "Sorry Jean" she sighed

It took just over a week, but she moved some money into an account for herself and got herself a small furnished rental for six months down town, she still hadn't got Sam out of her system, it had only been three weeks she didn't expect to just yet, but it felt like he was never going to let himself be forgotten, she was still crying at night.

 **Sam**

Sam got back home hoping, even praying, that Mercy had taken her time to think, decided it was all a mistake and she really wanted him, she'd be sitting on their couch waiting for him to come back just to jump into his arms and ask for forgiveness. His eyes filled with tears when he opened the door to find the house empty, pictures missing, her personal items missing from the bathroom and a box of unopened condoms on the bed.

He grabbed his favourite bottle of whisky, a glass and sat feeling sorry for himself "How the hell am I going to sleep in this fucking place?" he looked around before throwing a shot down his throat **'You don't love me any more let's see how you like this song, say you're walking out that door wonder why it took you so long'** he sung sitting looking around their home, every corner producing a memory forcing him to take another shot to forget

On week four he started to take his life back, he needed his wife but that shouldn't stop him from having a life. He got washed, dressed and went to his head office as was usual for his days work "Sam" Stan shouted as he saw him walking past his office through the open plan conference space "Come have a word" he called him in smiling "It's been a while, should we be looking at the next step for you, I've had some good reports from your colleagues, even Simon"

"I can speak in confidence yeah?" he asked sitting down without being told to

"Sure" Stan sat down too saying, concern in his voice

"Well" Sam sat forward in his chair saying, as he sat and told Stan everything from the beginning when he met Shawna, to what happened in his hotel room finishing with finding himself at home alone and having no idea where his wife was "And I know I could go to her place of work to find her but she's asked for the break, and I love her enough to do that"

"So what's she thinking about you not pursuing her?"

"That I'm respecting her call, but it's killing me inside"

"Did you maybe think it was killing her too?"

"Maybe but it's her call, she walked" he smiled "I'm a prisoner of her love, I'll never give up on the fact that she'll come back to me"

"You really love her?"

"We find love, we get up, we fall down, but we never give up" he replied

"Over my head" Stan laughed as Sam got up shook his hand for the ear and left his office

Two months later and Sam had given up going to all their familiar places, it was clear she was avoiding them, he wasn't even hearing anything from Mel about anything and he wasn't calling her to hear she'd told him so, Mercy and his business was still none of hers. Dean hadn't called him either which sort of indicated that Mercy hadn't said anything to anyone, which gave him hope. Wade had called, he was in town and fancied a hook up, they'd agreed to meet at a wine bar, have a chat and down some beers, Sam had decided he'd maybe tell Wade about his situation

 **Mercy**

Mercy had got stuck into work, ironically she was seeing less of Don now than she ever had, it was like the commitment thing with Sam stopped and everything that had been thrown at her as an obstacle threatening her married status had been suddenly removed. She'd linked up with a merry group of single girls now Wendy, Debbie, Linda and they were having a good time, out of town more than they were in and blowing off any opportunity they got, she was loving it, but nights were still hard.

They'd just got back from a three week excursion and decided that today was the first day of their two week holiday and they weren't going to waste a single day "Shots at Tabby's" Debbie suggested as everyone cheered, it had been a while since Mercy had gone out anywhere near home, she was apprehensive but excited

"See you guys later" Mercy smiled throwing her case in the back of the car before getting in and speeding off, they usually slept on days off because they were so few and far between but two weeks was like a holiday at home, however; her mind was still set on getting a nap

 **'Hold me Down' by Daniel Caesar**

Mercy finally woke up to banging on her door "Mercy" Wendy shouted through the door as she looked at her phone to check the time "Shit" she jumped up saying she'd overslept and she could do with more, as she walked to the door and let her friends in "Sorry..." she frowned

"We know you overslept, it's always you" Linda laughed

Twenty minutes and I'll be ready" she ran off to her bedroom telling them, thirty minutes and some shouting later, she was emerging out of her bedroom in her sexy green number hanging off her left shoulder and draped across her hips as low across her breasts as she'd dare take it, looking all Nubian

"May I just remind you Miss Thing, no sex" Debbie laughed as they all got up and made for the door, making the thirty minute journey to the bar

"Fuck" she hissed as soon as she walked into Tabby's to see Don up on stage giving his rather sexy rendition of **'If' by Davido**

"Something wrong?" Linda asked

"Work colleague" she said pointing at him on stage "Old work colleague" she rolled her eyes saying, he zoned in on her of course and left the stage to go sing to her, there were a lot of people on the dance floor all heaving to the sound, Mercy was smiling, as he sung his seductive words, but on the inside she was pissed at him.

Sam and Wade sat in the corner of the noisy bar rocking and trying to have a conversation, Sam telling him about the situation he'd found himself in following that great dinner that never happened. The crowd cheered as they turned to watch this really big guy on stage singing and dancing with woman playfully, suddenly he disappeared into the crowd to more cheers, Sam smiled and carried on talking.

They carried on in conversation as they watched the guy that had just been singing sit in the booth next to them laughing, Wade took his attention from Sam's conversation for a while to look at some of the girls that had crowed around him

"Mercy" Sam heard looking around to see the same guy calling someone across the room it was the name that kept Sam fixed on this guys line of sight, he gasped when he saw Mercy walking towards this guy "Bring your friends" the singer shouted as they moved towards him like groupies

"You know I meant that out there" he told her as she got close to him

"What?" she looked back at her friends asking him

"If I tell you say I love you oh" he sung at her

"Stop it Don, I told you all that shit stopped a long while ago, I'm a married woman remember" she laughed

"Did you just say you're married?" Linda asked her as they all sat down

Sam sat looking at Wade, who could hear as much as he could with them all shouting over the music "Leave it" Wade grabbed his arm telling him, seeing Sam was ready for something "We'll leave, just say hi and leave, no trouble" he warned him

Sam got up grabbed his coat and cut his eye at the guy "What's his problem?" Don asked as everyone looked in the direction his eyes were looking

"Hi Mercy" Sam said not even waiting for a response before walking off, Mercy sat holding her chest, she was having a panic attack of some sort, her heart had just missed several beats "Did you hear him telling her he fucking loved her?" he asked Wade when they got outside

"I heard her say all that shit needed to stop" Wade corrected him "And I know you heard that too, and besides did you see the size of that fucking guy" he laughed "We couldn't have done that Sam, that's a battle to walk away from to plan your war moves"

"Yeah" he smiled remembering the size of the guy

"Sam" he heard he knew who it was before he spun round "Can we talk that was weird" she pointed back at the door saying "Hi Wade" she smiled as he waved

"I'll see you sometime" Wade looked at Sam saying

"That cafe?" she said pointing across the road, before they walked off in that direction, got their orders and sat staring at each other for a while before she started talking "Sam I'm sorry the way things actually ended between us, I guess I took the easy was out, but it still hurt, and I hope one day we'll be friends, I know this is all raw for you, for us, I'm still not adjusted yet" she finally looked up at him saying

"Well you seem to have moved on pretty quick to me"

"Listen, and I don't really have to tell you anything as officially we're separated, but that's like maybe the third time I've actually been out since we split and that was definitely the first time I've seen Don since way before that, there's nothing going on with anybody for me right now"

"You're still very much in my head Mercy" he smiled **'** _ **I got this girl she's making me crazy, I nearly let her have all my babies, pussy so good it sets me on fire, I leave myself I elevate higher'**_ he sung making her smile

"There's no denying the sex was love all the way, but somehow that wasn't enough for us" she grabbed his fingers saying

"It was enough for me Mercy, seriously, _**You're getting on a plane, and travelling far away, you left me with the pain I carry it everyday"**_

"I'm sorry Sam but we were destroying each other"

"What if I could make you a promise and stick to it, not that I've broken any you know that right?"

"I know that Sam"

 _ **'I never asked for much only that you stay true' I was wondering can you hold me down'**_

"I love you Sam I don't think I can deny that, but I don't think, right now we're what we need sorry" she got up saying

"Mercy" he called as he watched her walk away, she turned to hear what he had to say "Next time walk by, I can't feel this every time you reject me" he could see she was crying, but he couldn't help her he was broken too "Shit is that what they call closure?" he asked wiping his face some time later getting up leaving the two full cups of coffee on the table

Three months on and Sam was still living in the apartment, well living might have been an overstatement, his belongings where there, he was going to digs he hadn't even been invited to, just to get out of the place, Stan didn't say anything he knew he was working through some stuff and he needed holding down just now. He'd been and opened a new account for himself sending all the direct debits through it as Mercy was still paying half his bills until a month ago, shocked that her wages were still going into their joint account he did the same, scared to tether all ties.

Mercy had spent nearly a week explaining her husband to the girls who sort of called her a traitor for hiding the fact that she wasn't a single girl, like them, but hugged her saying they couldn't imagine going through love, a wedding and a divorce before they were thirty, and now she thought they felt sorry for her she put distance between tehm and her.


	3. Chapter 3

**Month 20**

Mercy had seen Sam several times over the past few months, she'd nodded and walked by just as he'd asked, he'd smile back but they never exchanged conversation, she was still crying herself to sleep on occasion, and missing him was an understatement, she was beginning to hate what she'd done, life wasn't any sweeter, she hadn't really expected it to be but maybe kinder would have made it all worth while, her faithful friend Jean had finally reappeared after nearly three months in Gambia with the president.

Sam had finally seen Don, his face was etched in his mind, the words he'd heard him tell Mercy were burning his ears, he'd needed to beat him down since the day she'd walked out. He'd told her not to speak to him but somehow being near her and not having any communication was worse than feeling like shit for anything she'd ever have to say to him, he so regretted telling her to walk by.

He'd finally got five days off, there was nothing he could find to do, the next dig he'd been told by Stan, Shawna had booked herself on, but he'd really lost all interest in her she'd cost him too much and he needed the work as a distraction so he signed up.

"Hi" Shawna walked up to him smiling as he neared "I heard that Mrs Prefect had left and I've been trying to catch up with you" she made to grab for his shirt as she walked

"Keep the fuck away from me, Wade told me how you knew that about me" he pushed her hand away from him "Up until now there's only ever been one girl I've ever wanted to slap, but suddenly I see you and there's two, I mean it keep away" he stared into her eyes telling her

"You say that like its my fault your damn wife..."

"Just stop right fucking there" he pointed in her face "I need to be clearer I guess, I don't want you, so stay the fuck away, did you get that?" he hissed before walking off leaving her watching him

"I'd say that was closure" Simon giggled in her ear as he walked by

"Fuck off" she hissed at him still looking at Sam, she walked around for most of the week, making weak attempts at being one of the boys and being frozen out by everyone, she finally got the message the day before they were due to leave, apologised to Sam and left "You won't hear from me again" she told him offering her hand to say goodbye

"I'm not there, I might never be" he barely looked at her before walking away

"It serves you damn right" Simon told her gloating, the next day they parted company Shawna firm in the fact that Sam had no use or need for her

 **Blessed by Daniel Caesar**

Back home and Sam was sat looking at that empty apartment, their empty bed as his constant reminder that half his life was missing "I'm going out" he jumped up walking towards the bathroom, saying to himself refusing to have another night in with a bottle of his favourite tipple, half an hour later he was dressed in his regular denims, shirt, t-shirt and sneakers, somewhere between the bathroom and the front door he'd decided he was looking for a fight

"Set me up" he shouted to the barman as he walked in, the barman held up a bottle of whisky, Sam shook his head and pointed at his preference, getting a look from the barman

"Strong stuff" he smiled

"I need stronger" he replied picking the glass up before he'd finished pouring "Just keep them coming" he told him throwing money on the bar as he spoke, turning to look at the crowd before closing his eyes and lifting his head to the heavens **'** _ **Everywhere that I go, everywhere that I be, if you were not surrounding me with your energy, I don't wanna be there, don't wanna be anywhere, any place that I can't feel you, I just wanna be near you'**_ "God I miss you"

"Sam" he heard as his eyes sprung open, he knew it was Mercy "This isn't what it looks like, we're on a works do and it ended up just us four" she stood in front of him saying

"What?" he looked at her blankly asking

"It's not what it looks like, I just want you to know th..."

"Mercy" she heard spinning round to see Don coming towards them

"Sam it's work" she flicked back round telling him "Don this is..."

"An old friend" Sam jumped in telling him "I'm an old friend" he looked at Mercy telling Don

"I don't give a fuck who it is, you just left me hanging over there" he spat at her totally ignoring Sam's introduction

Sam felt himself lift off the chair, someone was going to die right there, he didn't care how big this bastard was "Work" he heard Mercy remnd him, he looked down at her to see her begging eyes asking him not to retaliate, he sat back on the chair and listened to this man talking to his wife like he owned her

"Are you guys an item" he finally asked when he'd calmed down

"Not that it's any of your damn business" Don told him "But she's been on my wish list for a while, but apparently she has a husband, as you would know" Don finally looked at him

"Yes I do and I don't think he'd like to hear the tone you're using with his wife" he said throwing another shot down his throat

"He knows what he can do about that then, doesn't he?" Don told him

"Was that a threat?" Sam smirked, his eyes cutting into Don as he asked

"I guess" he smiled as Mercy stood watching the two men staring each other down, she wasn't talking because she was trying to work out what Sam had going on in his head right now, things could blow up, fast, plus she just realised she was on heat for her man

"I'll be sure to pass that on" he finally chuckled jumping off his stool "Nature calls" he smiled turning to Mercy as he left "Good to see you"

"You too" she smiled watching him walk away "So fucking sexy" she whispered under her breath, Sam must have heard her because he turned to look at her a smile on his face for that thought he knew she was having, she wasn't even hiding it

The rest of the night Sam spent in corners watching Mercy with her friends, while Mercy spent it looking around for a glimpse of Sam, once she found him he'd wait for her friends to catch her attention again and move, the game went on for the night until her friends were ready to go, Mercy was so up for a bit of her husband her eyes were running around looking for him, sad when she realised he'd gone

"I'll walk you home" Don told her

"You're fine, I'm fine" irritated at him interrupting her thought

"But still I'll walk you home" he demanded, Mercy rolled her eyes and agreed without words, she was fed up of this man 'My number one, I love you, I love you, put on one above you' he sang in her ear as they walked out the bar

"Is that the only damn song you know?" she looked up at him asking

"It's the only one that matters right now" he laughed

They got outside and got a cab almost immediately, Mercy gave the driver an address and they were off to her destination

"Is this ever going to happen for us?" he asked as they sat watching the road

"I'm still married Don, it's never going to happen, please stop trying, I don't think of you like that and I want you to stop, we can be friends"

"Friends?" he asked, the rest of the drive was silent

"Okay, thanks" she smiled getting out the cab as it pulled up outside Jean's house "She was expecting me hours ago" she walked off telling him watching him getting out the cab, she expected he was going to request a kiss, she seriously had her husband on her mind right now and whatever he was offering was no substitute

"Hold up" he ran towards her and pulled her back to him saying

"What?" she asked pulling away from him as she spoke "What are you doing pulling me up like that?"

"We've played at this for so long now Mercy, can we not move things forward"

"Don" she rolled her eyes "We've already been through this shit, I'm a..."

"Yeah a married woman I know, who's husband allows her far too much free time to be interested in her"

"He is interested in me" she shouted back at him "How fucking dare you"

"You have a husband at home but you're getting dropped off at Jean's why?"

"None of your damn business" she shouted at him

"Don't shout at me" he grabbed her by her arms shaking her "Don't shout at me" he shook her violently saying

"Don" she screamed "Stop it" she told him trying to pull away from him

"You don't have a husband do you?" he kept hold of her asking "You've never said his name, what's his name?" he pulled her to him asking

"Let go of me" she ordered, the both of them shouting by now

"Don" they heard looking round to see Jean standing watching them "What the fuck are you doing?" she walked up to them asking "Let her go, didn't you hear her?" she asked the next thing she knew she was on the floor and Mercy and Don were looking down at her

"Don what the fuck have you done?" Mercy asked wriggling out of his now loose grip "Jean" she bent down to help her up

"Phone the police" Jean shouted as Don stood looking down at her unable to believe he'd just done that

"Sorry Jean" he went towards her saying, watching as both women cowered away from him "Sorry Jean, I'm really sorry" he backed up telling her "And Mercy, I don't know what came over me, sorry" he walked away telling them

Mercy and Jean got in and tended to her grazes, Mercy making sure Jean was alright before she went to the spare bedroom and literally sat on the bed shaking for what could have happened out there tonight.

 **Mercy & Dean**

She was feeling alone, scared and vulnerable, this thing that had just happened it could have so easily gone so much more wrong and she didn't even see it coming, she needed to talk to someone, Sam actually, but that wasn't a safe option, she knew she shouldn't but right now she needed a friend and she only had Dean, she picked the phone up and called him

"Dean" she whispered down the phone when he finally answered "I need to talk, but promise me no cosy conversations with Mel"

"You know it would have to be a life and death situation for me to pick that phone up and call anybody about my girl's problems" he chuckled down the phone shocked to hear Mercy burst into tears on the other side. "What's up girl, what's that man done?" he asked concerned

Mercy sat telling Dean all about the event that had just happened and how she felt "I'm just so scared to meet up with him again" she finished

"Phone the police Mercy, you can't live with a man like that" he told her

"I don't live with a man like that" she told him looking at the phone

"What!" he shouted "You guys have split up, is that why he acted like that?"

"What guy we were never together" she told him confused with the conversation "Who are you on about?"

"This is Sam we're talking about right?"

"God no this is a guy I work with, Don" she gasped

"So tell Sam"

"We're not really speaking, in fact we're not actually living together right now" she paused rolling her eyes for going this far "And you need to keep that to yourself, I mean it Dean"

"What happened?"

"Nothing and everything, there were so many obstacles that first year, we just need time to work out what marriage is for us and if we really want it, it's nothing like what we dreamed it would be"

"Mercy I'm so sorry" he told her clearly upset "Should I come down for a few days I can maybe get a weekend?"

"No it's fine, I'm busy with work, I'm taking everything and anything right now to distract myself"

"But you guys still have that love you talk about all the while yeah?"

"I still love him yes of course I do, I'll always love him"

"Look Mercy something needs doing with that Don guy, either you call the police or you tell Sam and let him deal with it"

"Don's built like a freaking house, he'd kill Sam and I don't need Sam getting into shit like this, he'd die trying"

"At least this Don guy would get a message"

"If it happens again I'll think about it" she told him feeling better for having shared her stress, she eventually ended the call

 **Dean & Mel**

Dean; a gentle nearing seven foot giant body building fanatic, with long black hair, perfect teeth, a caring soul, vicious base guitar player and gossip, didn't even waste ten minutes before daylight, he'd talked himself into the situation being life threatening Mercy might be willing for this to happen again, but in his mind she may not be so lucky next time, this Jean woman might not be around, he picked the phone up and called Mel "Mel" he whispered as if Mercy could hear him "We have a situation" he told her

"Dean" Mel; a very outspoken red head, with fire green eyes to go with her temper, tall, skinny and totally in love with Sam since the day they became friends some 20 years ago, replied rolling her eyes "If this is about getting me into shit with Sam again forget it"

"No listen" he rushing in saying "They've well... they've split up and Mercy's rented her own property" he let out before he could catch himself

"What!" she shouted back at him "When did this happen?" she giggled "I knew it, I fucking knew it"

"Are you laughing?" Dean asked shocked

"No I'm not, but I know Sam won't want to speak to me again after this next conversation, because I told him so and I'm going to love telling him that"

That's not even what I'm calling about"

"What there's more?" she laughed

"Stop gloating" Dean shouted down the phone "Mercy nearly got raped last night and all you can think about is you're being right"

"She what?" she gasped down the phone "Is she alright?"

"Of course she's not alright" he spat back at her "And we need to do something about that and about getting or besties back together"

"Well I'm not going to fight some damn man am I?"

"I need you to be the brains in this operation" he told her "I have a plan, this Don man is going to find out that nobody fucks with my girl"

"I'll watch" she laughed "I'll call back with a plan tomorrow"

"Oh and if you choose to say something to Sam, let it be positive, he won't thank you for anything else"

"You talk like you know him"

"I don't but I know my girl" he laughed "Tomorrow"

"Tomorrow" she laughed before the call ended

 **Sam & Mel**

Sam jerked out of his sleep looking round, a bit disorientated before he realised he was home "How the fuck did I get here?" he asked himself sitting up to ruffle his hands through his hair before raking them down his face "God" he looked at the clock saying "11 is much too early to fucking wake up to do shit" he fell back on the couch telling himself, laying there for a while before he decided he was awake and sat up again "Cleaning" he looked around the room saying, remembering he'd promised himself he'd do some cleaning because he couldn't see the sink for the washing up that had sat there for over three weeks, he'd be dead if Mercy ever walked in and saw the place like this.

While he was washing up he heard a ping on his phone but ignored it, it would probably be his Dad wanting to know how they were and he really wasn't up to lying to him right now, ping he heard again picking his phone up off the counter to check it after drying his hands "Mel" he rolled his eyes whispering flicking his phone open and dialled her number "Mel" he smiled when she answered "What's up?"

"I just wanted to check how you guys were" she lied

"What this time in the morning, don't lie, what's up?" he laughed

"How's Mercy?"

"She's fine, what's up?" he sat down getting concerned about what Mel wasn't saying

"I really do care about her Sam, despite what I say sometimes" she whined

"Mel stop fucking about what's wrong?" he raised his voice asking her

"Okay, I know you guys have split up, I know she's living in some flat somewhere and truth, she was never good enough" she spouted fast

"We've been here before with this conversation, it's none of your fucking business"

"But you are, I dare you to say different"

"Mel...I can't lie you've been my best friend nearly all my life and I love you I do, but if you say one more bad word against Mercy, we'll be done, I mean it" he hissed down the phone

"We've always been truthful with each other Sam, I resent the fact that you hear Mercy's truth over mine, but she's your wife and I guess that trumps whatever we have"

"Truth" Sam smiled

"So I take back all I said about your marriage" she paused "But" she paused again closing her eyes before taking the plunge "Dean called me earlier this morning telling me about Mercy being near raped by some guy called Don I think, and she was that shaken up she called him in the middle of the night" she said before taking a breath

"What!" he shouted down the phone

"Mercy, nearly raped, Don" she paraphrased "Well she told Dean she was nearly, but for all we know she maybe just slept with the guy and didn't want to get into trouble with you" she stood waiting for his response but go none "Or she just wanted you to hear, and she knew this was the easiest way to get shit back to you" she hissed

"Mel you don't know shit" he spat down the phone "Mercy would never sleep with anyone else, we made a promise" he told her hurt in his voice

"I remember you guys promising to love one another for life, till death us do part of some shit like that" she giggled "Are you guys two kids playing adults, what did you promise?"

"Mel" he shouted getting her full attention "Next time I see you, you're getting a slap, I've always wanted to do that and you just crossed a line"

"I'm so fucking scared" she laughed "But seriously I know I don't act it a lot of the time but I'm rooting for you guys" she giggled "I'll let you go rescue the wife" she told him before the phone went dead

Sam sat looking at the phone, he'd seriously wanted to cuss Mel out, but in between all that gloating she'd actually been a friend in letting him know something was wrong with Mercy, that made him smile, she finally had his wife's back

 **Sam & Mercy**

Mercy had a bad night, she cried a lot for her situation last night, these past 8 months, the year long marriage that she couldn't keep hold of, and finally ended up doing some soul searching. She loved Sam, she'd never love anyone like she loved him ever again in her life, but something about the timing for them wasn't right, was it her was she insecure in his love "No" she told herself she was sure of that. At hour four she saw daylight start peeping through the dark curtains and looked at the clock "12.30" she told herself thinking she might go find something to eat and maybe tell Jean what was happening, she could hear her pottering about in the kitchen, she deserved an explanation for getting hurt.

"Morning" Jean said as she heard the door open behind her "Lunch in ten" she looked round at her saying

"Thanks" Mercy walked into the kitchen to make herself a coffee as she spoke

"You don't have to..."

"Sorry Jean, I've got to take this it's Sam" she opened her phone walking away from Jean and out the kitchen "Sam" she said trying to get as smile in her voice

"Never mind Sam, what the fuck happened to you last night?"

"Damn it Dean" she rolled her eyes and raked her hand through her hair "It was a misunderstanding"

"One that merited a call in the middle of the night with a very scared Mercy on the other end of it to Dean?"

"He's exaggerating" she tried to tell him

"Mercy you're not in front of me and I can tell that you're lying" he hissed down the phone "Why didn't you call me?"

"You said you didn't want to talk to me, I..." she stopped while they sat in silence, she was scared "I was scared" she finally told him

"Why?" he asked waiting for an answer "Why are you scared of me Mercy?"

"Not of you, I thought you'd say it was all my fault"

"Did he..."

"No he didn't, I would have died before I let him do that, I made a promise"

"We made a promise" he told her his heart jumping for joy "He's not going to get away with this, I promise"

"Sam I don't want you fighting him, you've seen the size of him, I don't want you hurt"

"I won't fight him Mercy I promise, are you alright, I mean really alright?" his voice much softer now

"Yes I am now and thank you" she smiled down the phone "And thanks for phoning"

"I guess I'm going to be calling you periodically to check up on you, I still have a duty of care" he laughed **'** _ **And yes, I'm a mess but I'm blessed, to be stuck with you, sometimes it gets unhealthy, we can't be by ourselves we, we'll always need each other, and, yes, I'm a mess but I'm blessed, to be stuck with you, I just want you to know that, if I could I swear I'll go back, make everything all better, whoa'**_

"I'm glad you care" she smiled down the phone "And thank you" she cooed at his song "Jean's just cooked me some lunch I need to go"

"We find love, we get up, then we fall down"

"But we never give up, bye Sam"

"Bye Mercy"

 **Sam & Dean **

Sam flicked his phone shut and his calm left him, he was mad, spitting blood, how dare that fucking man think he can lay a hand on his wife and get away with it, what was he really trying to tell him, keep fucking with him like this, well he was sure Don was going to get done "Dean" he laughed mischievously down the phone as he answered "You really need to stop chatting your girl's business, she will finish you one day"

"Sam" Dean laughed "I can't help it, if I see two of the loves of my life fighting I'm like a fucking Daddy, I need it fixed now" Sam laughed understanding what he meant

"I need a favour a big one"

"Hit me"

"Well... you still work out right?"

"I do" he laughed

"This Don guy is built, I mean built no way can I take him on by myself, I need help I mean some serious physical help with this one"

"Say no more I'm there... do you think we'll actually have to fight him?"

"I..I can't let him just totally get away with things that he's done, this man's been a fucking pain since day one"

"And what does Mercy say about this plan?"

"Well that's the thing because she asked me not to fight and I sort of promised I wouldn't"

"So that physical you're talking about is coming from me?" he laughed asking

"And that's for chatting Mercy's business to Mel" Sam laughed "But I'll be there"

"I guess I'll take one for my team, I asked Mel to come up with a plan"

"Scrap that, she's got a mouth that'll only bring trouble" he laughed "But thanks for taking one for the team, I'll set it up"

"But if I get hurt, I'll get Mercy's permission to batter the crap out of you" Dean warned

"Never going to happen" he assured him "I'll be in touch"

"Was that for me getting hurt or Mercy giving me permission to batter you?"

"Both" he laughed putting the phone down

He sat thinking about his earlier conversation with Mercy, she'd said their ending, told him she'd never give up and that made him so warm inside he smiled, there was still hope

 **Mercy & Mel**

Mercy was just about to put the first piece of her lunch in her mouth when her phone rang "It's Mel" she looked up at Jean telling her "She never calls me she hates that Sam puts me before her" she got up telling her as she opened the call "Mel?" she asked shocked

"Yes Mercy it's me" she said, Mercy could tell she was rolling her eyes, they could cut you in two if she decided to look at you the wrong way, but try as she might she wasn't about to deter Mercy from grabbing hold of Sam "And I know my eyes don't work on you" she giggled "I just called to say I'm sorry about what happened to you and I hope you guys work it out, I think you will"

"Thanks" she laughed "I think that must be the first, nice thing you've ever said to me"

"I have more, I just don't want you to hear them, I don't need you letting your guard down and treating my boy bad"

"I won't" she laughed

"You won't so straight, why did you leave him?"

"Seriously Mel" she breathed "We had a rough first year, both of us looking at other people, letting people get in between us, Sam's pressure to start a family it was all just getting to me and I just need space to breath, a reality check or something" she told her listening for a response from Mel but got none so she sat in silence waiting

"And?" Mel finally asked

"I'm not saying I don't love him because I do more now actually, but everything just went so fast for us, one minute we were playing house the next it was all real and then the baby thing.."

"You keep going back to this baby, you don't want children?"

"Yes I do, it just freaked me out, along with the Don and Shawna thing it was just suddenly too much and it made me wonder if we'd done the right thing"

"So now on reflection?"

"It doesn't feel like the end for us, but I guess that's up to Sam"

"Really?" Mel asked shocked "To what I understand you walked out on him"

"I did"

"Then if you know him, you know he's not going to run you down and demand you come back" she huffed "Stop you from going yes I can see that, but drag you back, really?"

"I know" Mercy rolled her eyes smiling at Mel's perfect summary of her husband "You're right"

"You're move lady make it"

"I will, I'll find the right time and I will" she put the phone down thinking, somewhere in there they'd started to become friends

 **Month 22**

 **Sam & Dean**

Sam was biding his time on the Don thing, he didn't want him to be looking out for them, he'd left it a couple of month, done a few digs, downed a few bottles of whisky and made his check in calls with Mercy, he looked forward to them. When they were out of town they could almost fool themselves into thinking they were just working and the other person was waiting for them at home, he was excited for this dig to finish, he needed to get home, looking forward to it even, for a change "Dean" he smiled when he got to his terminal, his luggage still in hand from his trip as they hugged "lets get out of here" he looked round telling him guiding him out of the airport

"It's set for tonight yeah" Dean asked he was pumped ready to finally be of use to his friend, they knew if Mercy ever found out everything would be at stake but Sam was right this man would just carry on if he felt she had no backing

"Yeah" the two men grabbed shoulders smiling

"But we eat first you agreed?" he pointed at him asking

"Do you ever leave your belly at home" he asked a smiling Dean

"Only when it's full" he laughed "Let's get this done" he followed him saying

They got back to the apartment and dropped their bags deep in conversation about the detail of how this thing was going down "I just want this trash dealt with" Sam bounced on the couch telling Dean "So lets go to the venue, I've been watching him, he'll be there"

"And he knows you yeah?"

"He knows I'm a friend"

"So we'll make sure that's the last thing he hears" Dean said rubbing his hand "And you stay out of sight"

They made their way to the restaurant in silence all Sam could hear in his head was Mercy's voice singing to him **'** _ **It's the things that you say, it's the way that you pray, pray on my insecurities, I know you're feeling me, I know sometimes I do wrong, but hear the words of this song, when I go I don't stay gone for long, don't know what's going on'**_

"Sam" Dean nudged him saying, Sam looked at him puzzled "Is this the place?" he asked him looking at the driver

"Yeah sorry" he shook himself saying "Got Mercy in my head telling me she's coming back home" he laughed paying the cab as they stepped out and into the restaurant for their meal, two hours later they were in the bar across the road drinking light beer "That's him" he nudged Dean telling him

Dean looked across at Don, a cocky tall guy, obviously thought he was god's gift to people he'd walked in with "We can't take all those guys on" he turned back telling Sam

"They'll leave" Sam smiled, spending the rest of the evening watching him "He's leaving" he finally jumped up telling Dean "Remember no names" he stepped off, they stood watching as the girls walked off leaving him staggering around for a short while before he disappeared down the ally to the car park

"Who drinks that much and then gets into a damn car?" Dean shook his head asking as they followed him

"Okay I'll wait here, shout if you need me" Sam told him standing back in a dark corner of the car park watching for anyone coming through, there were very few people, they were some of the last out of the club

"Don" Dean shouted across at him smiling when he turned to look at him

"Do I know you?" he slurred

"Mercy's friend" Dean pointed at himself telling this man

"Oh, Mercy yeah, sorry I forgot your name" they stood looking into each others eyes as they spoke

"Mercy's friend, as I said" he went closer to him telling him

Don instantly felt the threat, moving back and setting his fists ready for a brawl "I have no fight with you stranger, but I warn you, I'm a professional boxer"

"Finally a challenge" Dean smiled putting his fists up too "Let's see if those hands can do anything other than rough women up" he punched out at him asking, missing his target as he almost stumbled but caught himself, feeling the bite of a blow to his stomach as he bent, he needed breath for a second but quickly caught himself

Sam stood in his dark corner watching what he could only liken to the Mohammed Ali verses Joe Frazier fight all over again, they were back in time, it seemed like these guys had sat and watched that fight over and over until they knew each punch and were re-enacted it. His head moving as the blows impacted, he really wanted to join in but he'd promised Mercy, "Shit" he gasped when he saw Dean stop dancing around dodging punches and Don blowing hard for breath, then suddenly Dean went into another mode, he was punching, with both fists repeatedly "D" he shouted as he saw Don on the floor not moving "D stop" he ran towards him holding his hand as he went to deliver what might have been a fatal blow to Don's head "We don't want to kill anybody"

"Don't we?" Dean looked up at him asking

"No we don't" Sam smirked at him "Come on before he wakes up" he pulled him off Don saying, Dean wiped his hands on his jumper, took it off and rolled it up before they walked back through the ally and jumped into a cab heading for home, totally buzzed on the nights events, the following day Dean was back on a flight back home, Mercy none the wiser that he'd even been in the area let alone that he'd dealt with Don for them.

 **Mercy**

Mercy was at home, she'd stopped going out because of her fear of meeting up with Don again, more for the fact she thought if she was ever put in that situation again she'd kill him before he even got the words out, so the call she got was totally mind blowing as she listened to the voice on the other side of the phone "Mrs Evans?" the voice asked

"Yes" Mercy whispered back, the only person she could think of was Sam something had happened on one of his digs "This is she"

"Your husband gave your name, he's conscious now, but he's been beaten up, he's at main..."

"I'm on my way" she grabbed her coat and keys and left the house the only thing buzzing in her head was that she couldn't lose him, she couldn't lose him ' **'** _ **And yes, I'm a mess but I'm blessed, to be stuck with you, sometimes it gets unhealthy, we can't be by ourselves we, we'll always need each other, and, yes, I'm a mess but I'm blessed, to be stuck with you, I just want you to know that, if I could I swear I'll go back, make everything all better, whoa, '**_ _ **And I'm coming back home to you, and I'm coming back home to you, I'm coming back home'** _floating round in her head as she made her way to the hospital "I shouldn't have drove" she shouted banging the wheel as she sat in traffic "Fuck" she cried resting her head on the wheel imagining the worst, it seemed like an age before she saw movement, calming herself down by the time she parked up outside the building.

She calmly made her enquiries thinking a nervous wreck would be the last thing he'd expect to see, wiping her eyes she stood at his hospital room door, straightened her face pushed the door open in concerned mode "What the hell have you do.." she stopped in mid flow shocked to see Don laying in the bed "What the fuck is this some sort of joke?" she asked attempting to walking out, to find a nurse

"Mercy" she heard him call "Your husband he..." she heard stopping her in her tracks as she turned to look at him

"What about my husband?"

"He did this" he told her

"My husband did this?" she looked at him asking "I don't believe you"

"He did and he's going to prison for it"

"Mr Ahmed" they heard as Mercy swung round, while Don looked behind her to see the police standing in the door

"That's me" Don told them "And this is the wife of the man that did this to me, I got a clear look at his face" he told them, watching Mercy's face pale "He was my height, maybe just a bit more built than me, American, black and he had a scare just above his nose a round scar" he told them

"Is that your husband Mrs..."

"Mrs Evans" she looked at them to say "No it's not"

"I saw him, he stood in front of me telling me he was your damn friend"

"My husbands much shorter than Don, he has no scars on his face, he's built but nothing like him" she looked at Don saying "And he's white" she took her purse out to reveal a picture of them together on their honeymoon

"But he said your name" he tried to sit up saying to Mercy

"Maybe it was someone who witnessed you trying to rape me a few months ago?" she asked him "Yeah maybe it was that officer, this man tried to rape me two months ago, I have a witness, she got hit by him, and he's a semi professional boxer" she smiled as she gave them the information, eventually they let her go and of course she sprung straight over to their house to see Sam

She didn't knock the door she still had her keys she just walked right in, Sam was laying on the couch almost naked with the TV blasting his latest game "Mercy" he said surprised as he sat up and looked around to check the house, he wasn't the tidiest animal and she was so picky about their things

"Don't Mercy me Sam, Dean and you beat the shit out of Don, I asked you not to fight and you want ahead anyway?"

"I didn't fight, I made a promise" he waved his arms trying to calm her down

"What if he'd have been killed?"

"He was a better fighter" Sam told her

"Don I mean" she cut her eye at him "What if he'd been killed?"

"We care because...?"

"Because Dean and you would be sitting in a damn cell right now that's what I care because of" she looked around the apartment telling him, instinctively picking things up as she spoke to him telling him off about the whole situation, by the time she finished talking to him, and sometimes herself, she was at the kitchen sink washing up as Sam watched her do her thing "And keep the damn place clean" she finally told him as she grabbed her coat and keys "We find love, we get up, and we fall down" she said smiling at him as she walked

"But we never give up, Bye Mercy"

"Thanks Sam Bye" she smiled

He lay back down feeling pleased with himself, she'd actually appreciated what they'd done for her, she seemed to be coming around, she smiled, cleaned and said their words he was in a good place, "Maybe soon" he smiled

 **Take Me Away by Daniel Caesar ft Syd**

The week of their second anniversary and she was still missing Sam, she didn't know what that man had actually done to her but she was never going to forget him. She sat trying to work out what she actually wanted, she knew it was Sam but, they'd got this fairy tale of how things were supposed to be, and that hadn't worked out she needed time to think real, to adjust to life to grow up "Maybe that's it I just need to grow up, or do we need to grow up?" she asked herself. Suddenly there was only one person in the world she needed to speak to, she picked her phone up and made the call

"Mom" she got out before the tears fell, she cried for at least fifteen minutes before she could compose herself enough to talk, her Mom sat quietly listening to her story on the phone as Mercy poured her heart out

"So do you still love him?" she asked

"Of course I do, but we both thought about being unfaithful in the first year of being together Mom, are you listening to me?

"I'm listening" she chuckled "Honey the amount of times me and your Dad split up in the first five years of our marriage could break any Guinness book of records" she laughed "And we both thought about it, negotiated levels even, and once I even went to meet the guy in the hotel room" she laughed more "But love for your Dad stopped me and stopped him too"

"So what are you saying Mom marriage is a web of lust for other people?"

"I'm saying you're both human, but love is how you come out of those situations in tact"

"I love him, I still love him, I'm in love with him"

"You'll learn to love him in time girl"

"What does that even mean?" she giggled down the phone

"You'll know what I mean when you get to the point where regardless of what anyone says about him you know with conviction the truth" she told her "You can't plan life, you live life and face obstacles together, that's what making a life together is all about" she paused for the information to sink in "Its your call either you believe he loves you or he don't, whether you believe he's capable of that shit or not, you can't live in doubt, that never works and if that doubts in you, that's a problem you need to sort out before you can take any steps forward"

"I need to think" she told her Mother finally closing the call, the last time she needed to think like this she made her way to that little down town hotel in Oklahoma and that's were she was going again, she needed pampering, plus it was the perfect place to hide

 **Sam**

Sam had found himself sitting in his apartment, thinking, something he really didn't like to do nowadays, it got him angry, it was his second wedding anniversary in less than a week and somehow no one had a dig going on, any other year and he'd be begging for the time off. His phone rang the family tone and he sat looking guilty for how long it had been since he'd spoken to his parents but that was because he really didn't want to lie to them, he reluctantly picked it up to answer the call "Dad" he smiled feeling some release in saying that "How is everyone?"

"We're both fine Son it's you guys I worry about"

"Why?" he sat up asking, concerned that Mercy had finally gone public

"Because my daughter-in-law usually calls me once a week and my son's usually sitting somewhere near her kissing her and that hasn't happened for near on six months now, Mercy's not answering her phone and you don't call"

"We've been busy" he offered

"Doing?"

"Dad" Sam rolled his eyes blowing out at this truth he was going to have to tell now "We split up, well she left me" he said to silence, he couldn't speak any more he was too chocked up

"What happened?" his Dad finally asked, his voice soft as he listened to Sam's account of events "I've been there Son and I can't identify with the split thing because, lucky for me, I saw that coming and changed my job to suit my home life, not that that's what I'm telling you to do mind, you love your job"

"But I love Mercy more"

"That's a decision for you guys to make I'm afraid Son" he told him "I know you guys live on this getting together falling in love, getting married and happy ever after stuff, but that's not real life"

"Tell me about it, it's been so hard, but worth it I thought anyway, and then suddenly she needs time to think or something, I hope she comes around, I pray it actually"

"You both have some growing up to do I guess this is it"

"I guess" he said thinking about what his Dad was telling him, they talked more in confidence before Sam closed the call

Sam sat thinking he couldn't change his job, he loved it, but maybe he could adjust his work and life balance, he'd go to see Stan, he'd made a decision about his life, he didn't want to leave his chosen field of work and he wasn't expecting Mercy to drop back in his lap, but he needed a future, he grabbed his portfolio, wrote his plan out and went to negotiate with his boss to get his life on track,

 **Oklahoma**

Sam sat in the foyer of his favourite hotel sipping his whisky, he'd met Mercy there some 6 years ago and honestly it had been the best two weeks of his life, he busied himself during the day and there was a decent little club at the hotel for evenings, but when he went to bed he felt like Scrooge all his past ghosts seemed to haunt him in the shape of Mercy. He smiled as he looked around the half naked women laying around, jealousy in his eyes when their partners came to give them attention. He'd just called for another whisky and was waiting for the waitress to bring it over when he looked up at hearing a giggle "You're drink Sir" Mercy held the tray out smiling at him

"Mercy" he smiled jumping up "What are you doing here?"

"Running away from my second anniversary and all the memories I can't handle right now" she laughed

"God me too" he laughed taking the tray off her surprised when she hugged him, he held her for longer than he should have but he needed to, he loved her arms

"I'm off to the pool, we might see each other later" she looked around awkwardly telling him

"Yeah sure" he smiled as he watched her walk away, for the rest of the day she seemed to have disappeared into an hole somewhere, after his lonely dinner he decided to frequent the bar not to drink just to people watch, well specific person search

"Hi" Mercy bounced up next to him from nowhere saying "I had the best massage, steam and pamper today" she giggled "But now my room smells like a damn brothel, whatever that smells like" she laughed "Sorry I've been drinking champagne all day"

"Hi" Sam laughed, he was happy she was under the same pressure as him with all this anniversary stuff, except he still loved her, so keeping away from her was extra hard "At least you're enjoying yourself"

"I'm so buzzed for seeing you" she looked up at him saying "I miss you Sam" she stared into his eyes

"I miss you too" he smiled, he could see her looking at his lips, he was looking at hers "Restraint" he whispered to himself "I need the bathroom" he jumped up telling her "Back in bit" he smiled as he got up he brushed her hair off the back of her neck and kissed it ' _the way you kiss the back of my neck demands that I take all my clothes off and give myself to you'_ he smiled thinking as he walked away

"Fuck" Mercy said out loud crossing her legs for the sensation that just passed through her as she watched him walk ' _I can see your muscles under your shirt flexing"_ she licked her lips thinking "G _iving me the most delicious thoughts, I might tell you about those tonight_

"So" he came back to sit on the stool next to her saying "You were missing me, I was missing you" he looked at her "And I'm guessing that imagination of yours went all the way there while I was away, I know mine did" he laughed

"Sam" she laughed loudly, making him laugh harder "You really read that present didn't you" she leaned on him asking

"I did it meant something" he nodded

"It meant something to me too, I'm sorry" she looked up at him tears in her eyes

"Don't be sorry you had to find yourself, I get that" he smiled

"I found myself, I'm looking at myself" she looked into his eyes telling him "Take me away" she begged him

" _ **Could this be a strange new love I've got, plus she's always got that loud pack, every time she throws that ass back, all she says is, take me away"**_ he sung tossing her off his chest and pushing her towards the door

"Is this going to be an amazing night?" she asked cheekily

"It's going to be an even better morning after" he told her as they got in the lift to his room

"Sam" she stopped him as they got inside the room sobering up as she looked into his eyes "Have you..."

"No I'm married to you, and I made a promise"

They stood looking at each other for what seemed like the longest time their lips calling each other, but they needed this to mean everything, they were sealing for the last time this love they'd found so many years ago in this same place, it has evolved, it was a different kind of love now, it wasn't built on their dreams, ambitions, making house, getting jobs, sex and happy ever afters, this love was being built on commitment, trust, loyalty and truth "I love you" she told him tears in her eyes as she spoke to him "I want to grow up with you"

"You know I love you back, I need to grow up for you and this is going to go real slow" he smiled

"I think I'm at gratification stage this first time babe" she giggled as he grabbed her lips

"Sorry babe, not that there was a plan but that's not happening" he smiled down at her when he'd finished with her lips

She looked up at him thinking how wicked he was, he could see the want in her face, she rubbed her hand across his back waking up his zone as she looked in his face smiling at his movement to her action, taking time to play with his lower back grabbing his butt to pull him closer as she talked watching his stomach and chest muscles flex as his body slowly gave in to her. She didn't realise his hands were at work undoing buttons while he stared back into her laughing eyes, she closed her eyes at the sensation as his hand crawling up her leg slow as she twitched in anticipation of where he was going. Her breath itches as he playfully skims past her sensitive place and she felt his finger rest high on her inner thigh strong and hard "Sam" she closed her eyes her tone begging

He was lost, her hands had touched him, everywhere had turned into a zone for him, the touch of his wife had woken his body up in ways he didn't even remember existed, he was trying his best to go slow, to make her feel loved but his needs kept overtaking his body and his hands were going for her well known zones and then in the midst of all that she called his name and he couldn't ignore her needs any more he refused to hear her beg him for anything, he let her waist go to lower his shorts using his right hand to part her legs using the same hand to lift her leg up to wrap it round his waist, flipping her round to give her the door for support, lifting her butt up he slams her down on him hearing her scream with satisfaction "Yes" she screamed as if she were watching a horse race. She willingly wrapped her other leg around him and bounced hard as he threw her up and down on him, finally his lips find hers again as they both searched for gratification

"Stop" he held her hips steady saying knowing he was close and using no protection "Mercy stop" he opened his eyes telling her, pulling himself out of her as his body held her up against the door, her hands clinging tightly round his neck her legs pulling him in, he turned and moved towards his bedroom, finally throwing her on the bed as she lay watching him search the draws for protection "Shit" he spat when he finds none "Sorry there are none, we'll have to make do with alternatives" he frowned at her

"Okay" she smiled jumping up to grab his shirt, and actually ripping the buttons open "It was teasing me" she laughed pulling him down to her grabbing his lips and taking control, his hands on her rubbing at her button making her move harder, faster bringing her back to where he'd left her a short while ago, she surprised him by closing herself off

"What?" he looks at her asking

"I just need more" she put herself on top saying

"No protection Mercy" he grabbed her hips trying to move her off the top of him but she sunk down on him so fast his voice itched at the surprise of it. She moved on top of him smiling down at his fuck me face, she knew he wanted her to cum first, he always did but today she wasn't doing that until he did, she knew he loved her but today, for whatever reason she needed to feel his ultimate love, she moved faster watching his face distort as he tried to keep his body in check

"Sam" she called looking down at him, his body stopped moving, she knew this was all part of his control thing "Do you love me?" she asked

Suddenly his eyes opened, his face smiled at he looked into her eyes "With all my heart"

"Let's pretend we're thirty, can we make our baby?" she asked

He didn't answer he just rolled over so she was beneath him, she could feel him loving her, just her, he was taking care , his eyes watching her face "Mercy" he called as she opened her eyes to look at him "Our baby's coming" he told her she could tell he was at his point of no return and that did something to her insides, she needed to close her eyes and take her moment but this was their moment she jerked as his love hit her insides, she felt herself grab hold of him at that second as she pumped in rhythm to his pumping, they looked at each other sure this was the making of their baby.

Mercy lay feeling loved, pretty, young, strong, her legs and arms still wrapped around her husband as he lay breathing hard on top of her. Sam lay thinking that was the single most explosive, intense event of his entire life, he felt like jumping up and hitting his chest repeatedly to tell the world he'd just had his first hit at making their perfect human being "Are you alright?" he lifted his head to ask her _**'She loves to top me off'**_ he sung making her laugh "Are you?"

"I am" she purred _**'Take me away'**_ she looked up at him saying

"What again?" he lifted his head up asking

"Nobody makes a baby after one try" she giggled "Let's go wash up" she dragged him up and found the bathroom before retuning to bed for more of the same

Mercy woke up looking at Sam smiling over her warming her heart "What?" she smiled

"Just giving you another one of your fantasies" he smiled as she looked at him puzzled "The thought of waking up to me stiff and ready for you" he smiled making her giggle _**"We find love"**_

" _ **We get up"**_ she sang back smiling

" _ **And we fall down"**_ he sung

" _ **We never give up"**_ they looked at each other singing

"Happy Anniversary" she smiled up at him "Cotton I believe"

Sam looked at the sheets, as Mercy ran her hands over them "Cotton it is, Happy Anniversary"

The End


End file.
